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I don't know since when MTF-blogs are working again,, but since I know now it's working again, I want to make an entry for the first time in more than one year, and this topic isn't a happy one.

I just feel like expressing how I feel at the moment... Not really happy. These three jobs are making me crazy as hell at the moment,, something like, "oh, I have to do this, have to do that for this job," and the same for the other two.., and I feel like I am making people not happy, and they make me not happy, because I feel they are not happy with me. Whatever I do at the moment seems to be a wrong move. I don't know if it's just my psychological weakness, but I just feel negativ at the moment. These are all my speculation, and might not true, but I feel so. I never felt this way..

I talked to my partner, and she said I should quit one job or take a break,, but I can't quit a job, otherwise I would have a financial problem. The life must go on, fighting... Yes, I should keep fighting, but I don't want to have a mental burn out,, which might indeed take place soon, if it goes on and on like now...

I hope things are getting better here,, I need a long holiday,, long long holiday...

SP
 
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