[Action Jackson]

Any journalist asking a dumb question like for example to Marc Rosset. Are you happy you lost? Yes, delighted will have their accreditation denied for 10 years.

Any player who says you know more than 15 times within a 4 minute interview will be suspended for 2 months and forced to take language lessons.

[Naranoc]

Any player who says you know more than 15 times within a 4 minute interview will be suspended for 2 months and forced to take language lessons.

Guess that would be part of Mr Disney's plan to stop Federer voicing his opinions on Round Robin

[adee-gee]

- Xristos is automatically given the #1 spot because he says he's better than Federer

- Only televise matches where both players have hot girlfriends. Spare us the sight of Monster Mirka

- Uncle Toni is officially placed in charge of draws.

[Action Jackson]

When there is a rain delay the match that must be shown on TV is Irakli Labadze vs David Nalbandian, one wearing a leopard skin g-string and the other clad in hot pink.

[adee-gee]

- Irakli Labadze to undergo an obesity test.

- Bald players to be banned from tennis.

[adee-gee]

- Tennis to never be shown in Croatia (it might spare us the Croats on here )

[Action Jackson]

Originally Posted by adee-gee

- Irakli Labadze to undergo an obesity test.

- Bald players to be banned from tennis.

Irakli is big boned.

Those bald guys have such an advantage at altitude.

[Action Jackson]

Originally Posted by adee-gee

- Tennis to never be shown in Croatia (it might spare us the Croats on here )

That is against the ethos of Mr Disney and since we are Mr Disney's loyal subjects, we must show respect to this man.

[Action Jackson]

There will be an ATP event played in La Paz at 3700m above sea level, where there is an actual benefit and problem with the altitude.

At the change of the ends the ballboys will give the players oxygen masks, then after the match, they will get drug tested and they will fail cause they had too much CO2 in their system.

[adee-gee]

This is called the LaLo rule.....

- During doubles, all players must hold hands during the course of a point. If their hands become loose, the point is lost.

[its.like.that]

Originally Posted by adee-gee

This is called the LaLo rule.....

- During doubles, all players must hold hands during the course of a point. If their hands become loose, the point is lost.

[its.like.that]

This is called the Safin-rule:

Each time a player hits a clean winner, they must pull their shorts down around their ankles for 30 seconds.

[its.like.that]

The home-run rule:

Each time a player hits a ball outside the barriers surrounding the court, he must do a lap of the court before playing the next point.

[scarecrows]

Have midgets instead of ballboys

[Action Jackson]

The Russian mafia must be official bookmakers, since most of the gamblers here think the matches are fixed.