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Old 07-24-2012, 06:47 AM   #1
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Default MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

IMPORTANT NEWS

Mr Dustin Brown, the legend himself, read the MTFBio and announced it into his twitter, give it a look:


Thank you so much, Dustin, i'm glad you enjoyed it, you're a legend of the game and your Bio was a big pleasure to make.

Also thank you Scoobs for posting it here

Okay, here's the bio:

Hello, my beautiful bacon-flavored gummy bears. It's Professor Johnny Viruz and this is:



Today:
Dustin Brown



Oops! Sorry!





This is MTF Bios and not that fake biography you can read on the Internet. So, here we're gonna tell you the REAL story about Dustin Brown.

Dustin Brown was born in mid 1984 in Trenchtown, Kingston, Jamaica. He's the son of legendary reggae singer Bob Marley.

- Sorry to interrupt you, but he was born in Germ...
- SHUT UP!!!! This is the REAL story, i'm working, dude, let me do it without your bitching
- But... You're wrong! He's a germ...
- YOU-BETTER-SHUT-YOUR-ASS-UP


As I was saying...
We all know Bob Marley had a loooot of kids, most of them reggae singers.


You're probably asking: "WEITAMINET you motherfuckin faker, if he's Marley's son why is his surname Brown?"

- Yeah... That's exactly what i'm asking... I also don't know how he could be a son of Bob Marley because he was dead in 1984.
- OKAY, PIECE O' SHIT... I'm so fuckin tired of you. NO! Bob M wasn't dead, that was a fake rumour, the boss is still alive. And YES! his surname is brown because his step dad was James Brown, now please... SHUT UP!!!!


When he was 10 years old, Mini-Dustin started to love tennis, but James Brown wanted him to be a soul-vocalist... Dustin prefered to be a guy like Sampras over a guy like his dad.
So, because of that, he was sent to live in Jamaica again, this time, by himself.

He learned Rastafarian culture, how to make a joint, how to love reggae music and specially, how to play tennis.



Before Dustin, tennis in Jamaica was somthing like this:




And now, it's something like this:



(see? Now there's no hat!)



STYLE OF PLAY

Dustin has a Ph. D from the Monfils university, that means, the guy can play really beautiful points, dominate his rival beeing 6-0 5-0, and then blew so many chances you would need the entire population of Jamaica to count them.
Eventually losing the match 6-0 6-7 6-7.

Or, he can reach his super-dreddy form and win over Fedalovic-fusion-into-one-player and win 6-0 6-2 6-0 6-4 (best of 7)

But we're so good guys, let's look at his tennis weapons in YouTube:



As you can see: The guy can hit the ball with a powerful two handed backhand and a beautiful one-hander it's like Nalbandian having intense brutal sex with Gasquet and having a black rastafarian child. (Oh Richard, how could you? )


One of his signatures shots is the "Weird-return of serve", with that weapon he can hurt even the most talented playrs like Baghdatis or Berlocq:



(Skip to minute 6:20)




But his most lethal weapon is the DEADLY FOREHAND:





In 2010, Dustin Brown decided to play under the german flag.

- ...Okay ...Why?
ARE YOU REALLY ASKING?!?!!


Because this:




And this:




And of course, the final reason, to live everybody's dream.
Becoming this guy:




(Oh come on, German people, don't get mad. You know we all want to become that guy once in our lives)
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Last edited by viruzzz : 01-21-2013 at 07:30 PM.
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Old 07-24-2012, 06:52 AM   #2
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Dustbin Brown!
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Old 07-24-2012, 07:39 AM   #3
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

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A dishwasher has more personality than Sampras.

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As for Mugray, what can be said? A disgusting human being, and awful player, and a choking pushing mug. He looks like a kemo patient, bald spots, hairless legs, pasty blotchy skin, busted teeth, and an ugly, snarling face. Typical antics all came out in this match: faking injuries, grimacing and cursing, trying to peg Fed, trying to start drama, undeserved final based on an exhausted old man and a joke draw.

I'm no Fakervic fan but he needs to save tennis, sadly tree trunk legs will be fresh. Interesting he's never questioned...
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Old 07-24-2012, 07:43 AM   #4
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

epic thread

edit: lol
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to viruzzz again.
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Old 07-24-2012, 01:24 PM   #5
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnbert View Post
edit: lol
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to viruzzz again.
Same here
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Old 07-24-2012, 01:37 PM   #6
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

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Old 07-24-2012, 01:40 PM   #7
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Bored viruzz is an asset to MTF
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Old 07-24-2012, 01:42 PM   #8
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Yes thats Dustin
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Old 07-24-2012, 01:43 PM   #9
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Good shit.
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Old 07-24-2012, 02:19 PM   #10
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Hehe, good stuff.
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Old 07-24-2012, 02:23 PM   #11
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Haha, that forehand vid is class.
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Old 07-24-2012, 02:25 PM   #12
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

You are too good
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Old 07-24-2012, 06:19 PM   #13
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Thank you all, keep tuned, MTF Bios isn't going anywhere.
We just need a really boring time.


Quote:
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Haha, that forehand vid is class.
Yup. Probably the best video in all youtube.
That's the most powerful weapon in tennis.
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Old 07-24-2012, 07:00 PM   #14
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Mr. viruzzz, master of satire

Respectfully,
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Old 07-24-2012, 07:02 PM   #15
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Default Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Germany > Jamaica
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