Losing someone you love - MensTennisForums.com

MensTennisForums.com

MenstennisForums.com is the premier Men's Tennis forum on the internet. Registered Users do not see the above ads.Please Register - It's Free!

Reply

Old 01-21-2014, 12:48 AM   #1
Dave_92
Registered User
 
Dave_92's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Milan
Age: 22
Posts: 7,975
Dave_92 has a reputation beyond reputeDave_92 has a reputation beyond reputeDave_92 has a reputation beyond reputeDave_92 has a reputation beyond reputeDave_92 has a reputation beyond reputeDave_92 has a reputation beyond reputeDave_92 has a reputation beyond reputeDave_92 has a reputation beyond reputeDave_92 has a reputation beyond reputeDave_92 has a reputation beyond reputeDave_92 has a reputation beyond repute
Default Losing someone you love

I never thought about losing someone you love..but in the end it happened, 3 days ago, it was my grandma.
My mom wake me and said grandma is not breathing..I didn't even cried at the moment..
Now, after almost 3 days, I'm a mess, I can't stop crying and watching every photos or videos of her.
She was sick, so many diseases..everyone was thinking she was going to die in 2011..but she fought and she lived another 3 years..
I always taked care of her when she got sick, because I really loved her..after school I always got to the hospital where she was in coma..every single day for months..until she came back home with us..
Then, months ago, she just stopped eating like a normal person..doctors said she had nothing,I believed them instead of believe what was happening to her.
She was waiting at home with us to go to another medical appointment..but she couldn't make it..

The biggest thing I regret is I wish I had did something different..I'm feeling responsible for her death..because I could have take her to another hospital, I could have done something, anything else better than I did..maybe now she will be alive..

I didn't tell her enough how much I loved her in the last months, there's so much I wanted to know that I will now never find out. I don't know if she suffered when she died. I want to know if she's in a better place, I want to know that she is okay. I want her to know how much I love her and how much I appreciated her. I hope that she is at peace. She was such an honest and a faithful woman. I miss her so much.
I feel lost and I'm in a dark place right now, I'm only wishing to die..but I can't do that because my dad, mom and sister are still here.


I would appreciate if someone could share any experience..
__________________
Roger Federer

4 AO - 1 RG - 7 W - 5 USO

302 weeks #1 - 6 WTFs


#bel18ve

..thanks for playing during my lifetime..you're amazing..
Dave_92 is online now View My Blog!   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 

Old 01-21-2014, 01:25 AM   #2
country flag Johnny Groove
Future ATP Star
 
Johnny Groove's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: South Florida
Age: 24
Posts: 35,049
Johnny Groove has a reputation beyond reputeJohnny Groove has a reputation beyond reputeJohnny Groove has a reputation beyond reputeJohnny Groove has a reputation beyond reputeJohnny Groove has a reputation beyond reputeJohnny Groove has a reputation beyond reputeJohnny Groove has a reputation beyond reputeJohnny Groove has a reputation beyond reputeJohnny Groove has a reputation beyond reputeJohnny Groove has a reputation beyond reputeJohnny Groove has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Losing someone you love

When there are times when you are at a loss what to do, get on your knees and pray
__________________
Respect the Laws of MTF
Brush up on your tennis history, people- Top 101 Tennis Players of all Time
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nathaliia View Post
What do you like doing on MTF most?
Reading Johnny Groove threads.

Quote:
Originally Posted by tripwires View Post
Johnny blurs the line between grandeur and grandiose
Johnny Groove is offline View My Blog!   Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2014, 02:01 AM   #3
country flag TravelingFanGirl
Registered User
 
TravelingFanGirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,437
TravelingFanGirl has a reputation beyond reputeTravelingFanGirl has a reputation beyond reputeTravelingFanGirl has a reputation beyond reputeTravelingFanGirl has a reputation beyond reputeTravelingFanGirl has a reputation beyond reputeTravelingFanGirl has a reputation beyond reputeTravelingFanGirl has a reputation beyond reputeTravelingFanGirl has a reputation beyond reputeTravelingFanGirl has a reputation beyond reputeTravelingFanGirl has a reputation beyond reputeTravelingFanGirl has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Losing someone you love

My grandmother and I were extremely close. She helped raise me and was my best friend! She was even a huge tennis fan and had a crush on Marat Safin. She thought he was gorgeous and looked best in a suit!
In 2009 she went to the hospital to remove gull stones and it was there that they found Cancer. I assumed she would recover from her surgery before the cancer started to effect her, but I was wrong. She never recovered fully and would only become sicker and sicker. I was living in her apartment and taking care of her every need! It was devastating for me to watch her become more ill with every day. Her skin was starting to change color, she was getting weaker and was in a large amount of pain. She's often look at me and ask me what she could do to make the pain stop. That is a very lonely feeling! My mom works 6 days a week, and my friends didn't visit me much so I felt really alone. I know my grandmother wanted me to spend more time with her than I did, but it wasn't easy for me. I would often stay in my bedroom trying to distract myself and come out when she needed something. At one point her speech wasn't right. I tried to discuss it with the medical aids that would visit but they kept insisting it had nothing to do with her illness. Then came the time where I could no longer care for her. She got too sick for me to handle and my grandmother was scared she would die while I was the only one there. She knew it would scare me! We admitted her into an old age home. I visited here there once, and it was terrible. I remember all I wanted to do was leave, but I felt guilty for it. When we did leave I wanted to hug her and tell her I loved her, but I couldn't. For some reason, as close as we were, we rarely showed affection towards each other. Because of that, it just felt so odd to say it. Instead, I just smiled and gave her a little wave. It was pretty pathetic on my part!

It wasn't long after, a few days in fact, before we got the call that she was dead. I had a feeling she was gone, and I didn't cry at first. I knew how much pain she was in, and I felt relieved she wasn't feeling that anymore. My friend was with me and I could tell she didn't know what to do. She expected me to break into a million pieces, but I didn't.
Weeks later I picked up the phone to call her, and that's when it truly hit me that she was gone. I still mourn over he death and will always feel a gap in my heart where she was. It was devastating for me when I couldn't tell her I met Marat Safin, and all the conversations I've had with Gulbis. She would have loved it all! But my grandma used to always tell me, "When it's your time to go. You will go." It was her time to leave, and I have had to accept that.

I can imagine what you're feeling but please don't beat yourself up over her death. It is NOT your fault! Life is for the living, and you can live for her!
If you ever need a friend, I'm here to talk.
__________________
THE TRAVELING FAN GIRL <-- click
Team Gulbis & Latvian tennis
-Stakhovsky- Schnur- Haase- Djokovic-Berdych-Janowicz-
#ToNameAFew

Tennis rackets & Ernests Gulbis go together like Redshirts & Star Trek. #expendable
ask.fm/FangirlCourtney
TravelingFanGirl is offline View My Blog!   Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2014, 02:04 AM   #4
country flag Mong Mong
Registered User
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 2,285
Mong Mong has a reputation beyond reputeMong Mong has a reputation beyond reputeMong Mong has a reputation beyond reputeMong Mong has a reputation beyond reputeMong Mong has a reputation beyond reputeMong Mong has a reputation beyond reputeMong Mong has a reputation beyond reputeMong Mong has a reputation beyond reputeMong Mong has a reputation beyond reputeMong Mong has a reputation beyond reputeMong Mong has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Losing someone you love

Sorry for your loss. Life goes on, and don't be regretful.
Don't blame yourself, you should thank yourself and remind yourself that you did your best, and that your grandmother will always thank you for that. You should say that at least you tried your best. You're a great human being.
Celebrate the life she has had; I know you are mourning, and that's human.
We don't know each other, but I will have you on my thoughts tonight.
__________________
ATP Royalties
King Rafael Nadal 1-9-2-2-G-64 | Prince Andy Murray 1-1-G-28

WTA Royalties
Queen Maria Sharapova 1-2-1-1-S-32 | Princess Petra Kvitova 2- 12

Last edited by Mong Mong : 01-21-2014 at 02:06 AM.
Mong Mong is offline View My Blog!   Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2014, 02:33 PM   #5
country flag miura88
Registered User
 
miura88's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 1,994
miura88 has a reputation beyond reputemiura88 has a reputation beyond reputemiura88 has a reputation beyond reputemiura88 has a reputation beyond reputemiura88 has a reputation beyond reputemiura88 has a reputation beyond reputemiura88 has a reputation beyond reputemiura88 has a reputation beyond reputemiura88 has a reputation beyond reputemiura88 has a reputation beyond reputemiura88 has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Losing someone you love

You'll never fully get over it, you'll just learn to walk again and put that person's death into the background, returning to it every now and again to be thankful for their life + how it impacted you. Her death wasn't your fault, and if you were as close with her as you said you were, I'm sure she knew how much you loved her, and the last thing she'd want is to hold you back from living your life. So yeah, it hurts like hell, but you'll come to terms with it eventually and it'll make you a much stronger person.

And lastly, suicide is never a good idea. Romeo & Juliet were a bunch of morons.
__________________
After all, history only tastes bitter to those who expect it to be sugar coated
miura88 is online now View My Blog!   Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2014, 02:35 PM   #6
country flag Naudio Spanlatine
I wanna taste u.
 
Naudio Spanlatine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Lust and/or Love of fire. My heaven has awaited me.
Posts: 23,838
Naudio Spanlatine has a reputation beyond reputeNaudio Spanlatine has a reputation beyond reputeNaudio Spanlatine has a reputation beyond reputeNaudio Spanlatine has a reputation beyond reputeNaudio Spanlatine has a reputation beyond reputeNaudio Spanlatine has a reputation beyond reputeNaudio Spanlatine has a reputation beyond reputeNaudio Spanlatine has a reputation beyond reputeNaudio Spanlatine has a reputation beyond reputeNaudio Spanlatine has a reputation beyond reputeNaudio Spanlatine has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Losing someone you love

I'm sorry dear
__________________
Cheering for my faves!
deestruction.tumblr.com
Naudio Spanlatine is offline View My Blog!   Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2014, 03:40 PM   #7
country flag August
Registered User
 
August's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Freistaat Bayern, DE
Age: 24
Posts: 4,802
August has a reputation beyond reputeAugust has a reputation beyond reputeAugust has a reputation beyond reputeAugust has a reputation beyond reputeAugust has a reputation beyond reputeAugust has a reputation beyond reputeAugust has a reputation beyond reputeAugust has a reputation beyond reputeAugust has a reputation beyond reputeAugust has a reputation beyond reputeAugust has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Losing someone you love

I have no personal experience to share, of close relatives, my both grandpas died before I was born.

But I think that rather than mourning after her, you should be happy of the moments you had with her.
__________________
My blog: August on Sports
My twitter: @AugustOnSports


Stan Wawrinka
The Saviour of Tennis
Australian Open 2014: Ended Nadal-Djokovic-Murray dominance in Slams
Monte Carlo 2014: Ended Nadal-Djokovic dominance in Masters
August is online now View My Blog!   Reply With Quote
Old 01-21-2014, 07:22 PM   #8
country flag Big Bodacious
Registered User
 
Big Bodacious's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 2,164
Big Bodacious has a reputation beyond reputeBig Bodacious has a reputation beyond reputeBig Bodacious has a reputation beyond reputeBig Bodacious has a reputation beyond reputeBig Bodacious has a reputation beyond reputeBig Bodacious has a reputation beyond reputeBig Bodacious has a reputation beyond reputeBig Bodacious has a reputation beyond reputeBig Bodacious has a reputation beyond reputeBig Bodacious has a reputation beyond reputeBig Bodacious has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Losing someone you love

Really sorry to hear this Dave. Stay strong.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Groove View Post
When there are times when you are at a loss what to do, get on your knees and pray
And that's gonna do what exactly?
__________________
Tungsten body, glowing mind.
Big Bodacious is offline View My Blog!   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


Copyright (C) Verticalscope Inc
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBCredits v1.4 Copyright ©2007, PixelFX Studios