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Old 05-09-2012, 10:26 AM   #1
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Default Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis ["Best of" List in Post #1]

After his first match on the blue clay of Madrid, Djokovic was quoted as saying:

Quote:
"To me that's not tennis. Either I come out with football shoes or I invite Chuck Norris to advise me how to play on this court
Then somebody commented saying: Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

So, here it is. Bring your Chuck Norris tennis facts on!


-------

The "Best of" List!



Quote:

- Chuck Norris doesn't use a racquet; he uses his fists. His backhand is literally his backhand! [comesbackatlast]
- Chuck Norris doesn't need to hit the ball - it sees him coming and turns back. [scoobs]
- Chuck Norris has never netted a ball. The net is smarter than that. [Orka_n]
- Chuck Norris, the only man to ever hit an ace in a return game. [Certinfy]
- Chuck Norris can hit a tweener without opening his legs. [BroTree123]
- Chuck Norris can return aces [TopSpin08]
- Chuck Norris can win tournament after Reed declares him favorite [Taejin] (Simon Reed)
- Chuck Norris can beat a healthy Nadal [Dr. Funkenstein]
- Chuck Norris can play on grass in the second week of Wimbledon [Taejin]
- Chuck Norris can run around his backhand and hit a backhand [Taejin]
- One time Chuck Norris hit a lob. It didn't come down. [Freak3yman84]
- Chuck Norris doesn't hold to love. He holds to agony and despair. [comesbackatlast]
- Chuck Norris volleys his opponent's serve. [Slice Winner]
- Chuck Norris can get to 4 consecutive breakpoints. [70-68]
- Chuck Norris once hit a triple fault and still won the point. [Johnny Groove]
- Chuck Norris wears colored outfits in Wimbledon. [70-68]
- Chuck Norris literally chokes his opponents. [Orka_n]
- Chuck Norris can hit a dropshot with 160km/h. [greenberetta]
- Chuck Norris is winning US Open in Paris every year. [JurajCrane]
- BYE was invented to protect some players lifes from Chuck Norris matchup. [JurajCrane]
- When Chuck Norris breaks a racquet, it turns into ash. [BroTree123]
- Every CN match costs about 50 line judges and 40 ballboys lives... [AlterBridge]
- CN can overrule Hawk eye [AlterBridge]
- Chuck Norris's kick serve is a real kick serve. [comesbackatlast]
- Chuck Norris can play a non-handed forehand. [comesbackatlast]
- Chuck Norris' body serve has a fatality rate of 100%. [Orka_n]
- Chuck Norris is the first player ever to successfully include controlled "lucky" net cord shots in his repertoire, even on return. [sicko]
- Chuck Norris defended his Wimbledon title with a sword. [MIMIC]
- Arthur Ashe stadium once had a roof, until Chuck Norris threw his racket in the air. [Dr. Funkenstein]
- Chuck Norris can defend his Wimbledon title in Melbourne. [70-68]
- When he is playing, the rain has a Chuck Norris delay. [comesbackatlast]
- Chuck Norris can bagel Berlocq twice in the same set. [BauerAlmeida]
- The "moonballing" term came from what Chuck Norris used to do. When you see the dents on the surface of the moon, you will understand. [comesbackatlast]
- After he wins, Chuck Norris throws his opponent to the crowd. [comesbackatlast]
- when the ball hits the netcord the net apologises to chuck norris [TigerTim]
- Chuck Norris once hit a tweener between the legs of his opponent. [Mercury]
- Chuck Norris takes MTOs in order to disrupt his own rhythm. [tektonac]
------


The "Worth Mentioning" list:

Quote:

- Chuck Norris is the only one to have won a calendar year grand slam by 28 walk-overs! [comesbackatlast]
- Chuck Norris doesn't have a backhand; he just has two forehands. [Slice Winner]
- World Tour Finals qualify for Chuck Norris [Pucho]
- Chuck Norris won the Calendar Year Golden Grand Slam, twice, in a non-Olympic year. [Johnny Groove]
- Chuck Norris once won a BO3 match after being 2 sets down. [sicko]
- When Chuck Norris breaks a player, he doesn't do it to his serve. [comesbackatlast]
- Chuck Norris turned pro 1940 - the year he was born. [mystic ice cube]
- Chuck Norris can win a calendar day grand slam. [comesbackatlast]
- Chuck Norris defeats EVERY player in the draw when he wins a tournament. [70-68]
- Chuck Norris overrules all the line calls. [GOAT = Fed]
- Chuck Norris' dropshots don't bounce up at all. The ball lands, and just stays there. [70-68]
- Chuck Norris can hit a passing shot from outside the universe. [BroTree123]
- Chuck Norris has more fans on FB than FB has users. [sicko]
- Getting a single drop of Chuck Norris sweat on your skin can cause a positive doping test [MaxPower]
- When Chuck Norris plays bh slice new balls are introduced after the point finishes. [tektonac]
- Chuck Norris' backhand slice literally slices the ball in half. [Slice Winner]
- Chuck Norris can hit an ace with a feather using a paper racquet. [comesbackatlast]
- Chuck Norris can hit the kicker, slider and flat serve at the same time. [Action Jackson]
- Chuck Norris can hit a forehand cross-globe. [comesbackatlast]
- Chuck Norris's opponents don't have return stats; they have self-protection stats. [comesbackatlast]

Last edited by comesbackatlast : 08-25-2012 at 12:23 AM.
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Old 05-09-2012, 10:26 AM   #2
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

Chuck Norris is the only one to have won a
calendar year grand slam by 28 walk-overs!
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Old 05-09-2012, 10:35 AM   #3
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

Chuck Norris once managed to beat Viktor Troicki!

Oh, wait..
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Old 05-09-2012, 10:40 AM   #4
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

Chuck Norris wins 110% of his service points.
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Old 05-09-2012, 10:42 AM   #5
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

did I mention that I´m not happy with the roundkick king
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That will be the last victory of Rafa for quite some time.. With his joke mentality and pathetic game, I hope the disgusting player loses every single match next season. He's disgraceful. He should just retire. He's a joke.
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Old 05-09-2012, 10:43 AM   #6
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

from yahoo sports
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Old 05-09-2012, 11:02 AM   #7
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

When Chuck Norris plays, the umpire calls for new balls after every point.
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Old 05-09-2012, 11:10 AM   #8
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

Slow and unreliable Hawkeye technology is switched off during his matches
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Old 05-09-2012, 11:13 AM   #9
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

When Chuck Norris plays tennis, he generally loses.
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Old 05-09-2012, 11:17 AM   #10
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kat_YYZ View Post
Slow and unreliable Hawkeye technology is switched off during his matches
Right. They bring sensors from CERN.
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Old 05-09-2012, 11:17 AM   #11
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

London calls Chuck Norris.
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Old 05-09-2012, 11:44 AM   #12
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

Chuck Norris doesn't use a racquet; he uses his fists.

His backhand is literally his backhand!
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Old 05-09-2012, 11:47 AM   #13
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

Quote:
Originally Posted by comesbackatlast View Post
Chuck Norris doesn't use a racquet; he uses his fists.

His backhand is literally his backhand!


Or if he does use a racquet, he strings it with the guts of his last opponent.
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Old 05-09-2012, 11:50 AM   #14
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

Chuck Norris doesn't need to hit the ball - it sees him coming and turns back.
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Old 05-09-2012, 11:53 AM   #15
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Default Re: Chuck Norris Facts in Tennis

Quote:
Originally Posted by scoobs View Post
Chuck Norris doesn't need to hit the ball - it sees him coming and turns back.
See, that's how you do it.
First good one
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