Pospisil: You want me to sign your what?
on Mon, 05/09/2011
I am actually in Korea right now but this blog will be a quick summary of my trip in Mexico.
I spent a week there with Coach Fred and an interesting week it was. A bit of tennis here, some NHL radio playoff action there, a session of chest signing, and an order of food poisoning on the side. After all, you have to have food poisoning to really get the full Mexican experience so I made sure I was able to cross that off my list.
The single most frustrating thing about the week there was, without a doubt, our inability to watch an NHL playoff game. Sure, there were about 4-5 channels in the hotel that showed soccer where the commentators would scream "GOOOOAAALLL" for five minutes every time a player managed to put it past the goalie, but nothing, and I mean nothing, hockey related could be found! Of course, some of you might be thinking "Why didn’t they just watch it online?” If you're one of these people then clearly you have never been to Mexico and used the internet down there. Finding a good connection is about as likely as finding a gold nugget in your bowl of cereal, and then choking on it. It was, however, barely good enough to listen to NHL radio. We huddled close enough to Fred's computer that I could tell whether or not he showered after getting back to the hotel.
On my last day in Mexico I took a taxi to the club (alone) which, with all the stories you hear, was probably not the best idea a Pospisil ever had. But I gathered my courage and after sweating through my last good shirt on the way, I was surprisingly taken directly to the front door with a smile on the guy’s face after I underpaid him. Not quite the cab experience I was expecting. I wasn’t about to risk taking a cab twice in one day so I took the tournament limo transport on the way back. Yea, that's right, limo : ) Fred left the day before and he was generous enough to leave his upgraded Fred Express Limo (I photo-shopped the photo to make Fred better looking but the rest of it is intact) behind in Mexico for the tournament to use until it finished. He finally took my advice and upgraded the quality of his in-flight services. Champagne anyone?
Before I end this blog I need to come clean and talk a bit about one of the most interesting and disturbing autograph signing experiences of my career. Last week in Mexico, I signed a boob! But not the kind of boob you're thinking. Not the boob of a hot girl or someone’s mom. Heck, it wasn't even a boob of an 80 year old granny. Nope, it was a man-boob! What could be worse?! Actually it was a 14 year old boy. Let me explain before you start jumping to conclusions. After I finished my first round match I came off the court and signed a few routine autographs before some kid started begging me to sign his chest (he used a different word that is not appropriate for this blog but was very impressive vocabulary if you ask me). At first I thought it was some kind of a joke but soon, to my disappointment, I realized that if I didn’t do it, he would probably start bawling on the spot. I just stood there confused, but my doubles partner, Nick Monroe, walked by just in time so I immediately went to him for counselling. "Are you serious? Just sign it, ha-ha". Had he not given me the ok, I'm not sure I would have gone through with it, but just like that, 5 seconds later, I was a changed man. Possibly scarred for life by the event. Definitely not the way I imagined signing my first boob. Happy Gilmore is a few giant steps ahead of me in this field.
I will go see a psychiatrist now and send my next blog from Korea.
Don’t think you want me going into details of the food poisoning so I'll leave it at that and let you imagine how great that must have been.
P.S. Big news, you can now follow me on twitter @VasekPospisil. Just don’t expect me to entertain you. Actually, don’t... don’t follow me.