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Wertheim's Top 5 Tennis Commentators (and those he wishes commentated).

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#1 ·
Masters of the Mic: Tennis

Jon Wertheim, SI.com


Let's say this off the top: for all that ails tennis, the quality of commentary isn't high on the list. Be it on the main networks, ESPN, or the ever-improving Tennis Channel, the folks in the booth tend to be a competent bunch with a nice mix of styles. Tennis' vox populi moan about the choice of matches that are covered and the erratic hours of telecasts. But critiques about the commentators are fairly muted.

My pet peeve: The persistent myth about tennis is that it's a gentlemen's past-time, a precious, genteel exercise. Golf with more sweat and less walking. The truth is that tennis is a vicious, arduous, gladatorial sport, the object of which is the break down your opponent. Its closest analogy is boxing: two competitors in a confined space with no teammates to help pick up the slack. The winner exults. The loser is left to nurse wounds that, while not black-and-blue, often run deep.

It is the rare tennis announcer who captures the mano-a-mano component of a match. The thrust and parry. The subtle momentum shifts, the psychological warfare. Some commentators don't get beyond forehands and backhands. Others giggle and gossip and prattle as though they're at a quilting bee. The best ones know when to inform the viewer but also know when the action speaks for itself. The best ones are journalists, who know about the players' backstories and personal demons and can convey them in a way relevant to the match at hand. The best wear flowery pants.

Gianni Clerici and Rino Tomassi, two irrepressible Italians, could top our list of favorites. But limiting this to American announcers, here is our starting five:


MY TOP ANNOUNCERS

1. Jim Courier: Far and away, the best of the former players. Courier, a four-time Grand Slam champion, is insightful, articulate, thoughtful and knows when to get out of the way. Though he is only a few years removed from playing, he is honest and forthright and isn't afraid to step on toes. It's just a shame we don't get more of him.

2. John McEnroe: Yes, he cleaves public opinion. Yes, he is disrespectful of lower-ranked players and too quick to criticize the sport. Yes, his lobbying for the nonexistent post of "tennis commissioner" is, at once, annoying and absurd. But on balance, we'll take Johnny Mac over almost anyone. As was the case when he played, he mixes genius with unpredictability. He has a singular gift for making the most lopsided blowout entertaining.

3. Mary Carillo: Too often tennis booths are awash with the kinds of conflicts of interests that would never be permitted in other sports. Tournament owners commentate on their events. Davis Cup captains commentate on their players. Carillo comes without strings. And it shows. She pries. She divulges insider info. She sugarcoats nothing. Plus she is wickedly funny. The highest compliment: time and again, folks are surprised to learn she was a former player.

4. Pat McEnroe: He ought to recuse himself from commentating on matches involving American Davis Cup players. But otherwise, The Captain is thoroughly competent and has a nice eye for subtlety. He also acquits himself well in the studio.

5. Bud Collins: In this era of style-over-substance, Collins' on-air presence has diminished. And the sport is immeasurably worse for it. You will not find a more erudite historian, a more worldly journalist, a more gifted wordsmith. And we miss that involuntary spasm of "Let-Court!"

FIVE GUYS I'D LIKE TO SEE IN THE BOOTH

1. Ted Robinson: Full-time. Calm and prepared and an ideal straight man for McEnroe. We love him at the Open and then he disappears for months.

2. Kevin Harlan: Roddick lines up the passing and -- LOOK OUT FOR DEAR LIFE! -- the ball whistles past Henman.

3. Michelle Tafoya: Tennis is the rare sport that could stand to use more sideline reporting.

4. Snoop Dogg: We still can't get this exchange out of our head:

Sports Illustrated's Richard Deitsch: What sport would we be surprised to know you like?

Snoop: Tennis. I used to like Ivan Lendl. He was sharp. An old schooler. Make it happen and roll out. Now I like Venus and Serena, but Ivan was the truth.

5. Charles Barkley: We give him a day at a tournament and we can hear already it: "All's y'all's nuts!"
 
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#3 ·
Ted Robinson worked for NBC during RG And Wimby but doesn't do a whole lot of commentary. Snoop Dog is a rapper and imagining him commentating tennis omgggggg "that serve was the shizzle!" :haha: :bigcry: and Charles Barkley was a great basketball player who retired a few years ago. interesting suggestions :scratch:
 
#8 ·
FUCK NO!

4. Pat McEnroe: He ought to recuse himself from commentating on matches involving American Davis Cup players. But otherwise, The Captain is thoroughly competent and has a nice eye for subtlety. He also acquits himself well in the studio.

FUCK NO!

1. Ted Robinson: Full-time. Calm and prepared and an ideal straight man for McEnroe. We love him at the Open and then he disappears for months.
 
#10 ·
I may not have any American network broadcasting tennis over here, but from what I've heard from other posters commentating is indeed something to complain about. Like TBE JMac is the only one I've heard and he's OK, although I'm convinced that he must lick Federer's boots as much as his brother does Roddick's, considering the amount of praise he heaps on him come Wimbledon every year (he was also the man who picked Federer to win RG AND Wimbledon back to back in 2002 and was terribly surprised when he didn't even come close). I've heard faint snatches of American commentary from various clips, and it seems to me they all suffer from a Captain Obvious syndrome that you don't get too much over here. Reminding you of the score after every point, telling you exactly what just happened (actually we do get a bit of that here as well)... when you notice the commentators more than the match, something is wrong.
 
#12 ·
Sjengster Like TBE JMac is the only one I've heard and he's OK said:
JMac, Mal and Mary C ***love*** Federer. Mary is the one who said famously that "Watching Federer was like watching music".


JMac has to praise Andy though, since Andy got him to appear on Saturday Night Live. They replayed parts of that show over and over during Wimbledon and I can still see JMac's enormous head above skinny shoulders and glaring purple shirt.
 
#13 ·
YoursTruly said:
Pat is okay, but he was better before. He's starting to step over the "annoying borderline"
I haven't really heard PMac commentate in years. He was great and professional in the CBS studio in the pre-Andy days. I can't really speak on his breakdown after becoming DC coach :devil:

Anyway, it does seem like a conflict of interest to be a commentator and a coach at the same time...
 
#14 ·
Mary Carillo and John McEnroe are the best I've heard. Really, the fact that they've been around so long sets them apart, I think. They both seem to talk a bit more than is absolutely necessary, but given the amount of atrocious matches they show here, I'm fine with listening to them. Mary used to be better, but is starting to get annoying. Same with Pat. Oh, and here's to getting Snoop in the booth.
 
#15 ·
MY fave is Mary Carillo. IMO she's the one who bullshits the least and calls things as is. And she actually is fun to listen to and cracks jokes every now and then that make me :lol: JMac I can live without, but pairing him with Mary make a formidable team.
 
#16 ·
Naldo said:
MY fave is Mary Carillo. IMO she's the one who bullshits the least and calls things as is. And she actually is fun to listen to and cracks jokes every now and then that make me :lol: JMac I can live without, but pairing him with Mary make a formidable team.
2003 RG. Mary Carillo said she couldn't believe that Agassi would have any trouble with Coria.

Any tennis fan knew that was BS
 
#18 ·
gbpgbp02 said:
2003 RG. Mary Carillo said she couldn't believe that Agassi would have any trouble with Coria.

Any tennis fan knew that was BS
Did I say she was perfect? No, and I was comparing her to the rest of the commmentators, not to the ideal perfect commentator standards. :)
 
#22 ·
This is like the worst list ever minus Mary!:rofl:
 
#24 ·
These ESPN puppets think their every word is sincere and true.

Carillo called Fed 1 of the classiest of all time like Edberg & Borg and screamed that Fed's a genius who's 1 of the best players of all time.

Mal absent-mindedly named Albert Costa "Carlos Costa."

Pat Mc lives in a fantasy where people enjoy his self-promotion.
He mentioned a U.S. Davis Cup player every 5 minutes.
He has no self-awareness like his brother. He has a nasal scream. He exaggerates his "passion" & knowledge. He called Safin a "Mental Midget," so Safin shoved his face in when he beat DC boy Roddick.

Drysdale really believes that Fed's the closest thing to the ideal player.

Tim Ryan just found out that award shows were held in July 2004 for 2003 achievements.

Chris Fowler told Fed that the locker room would be terrified because Fed could win all slams this year and asked Fed about giving the U.S. advice about playing at the French Open.

Honorably Mentioned Imbecile: Brad Gilbert screeched that no New Ball would reach the Wimbledon final & that Safin wasn't really injured. Gilbert gave delusional excuses for wimping out of European tournaments. Time & time again, he embarrassed everyone but himself.
 
#26 ·
Sjengster said:
I've heard faint snatches of American commentary from various clips, and it seems to me they all suffer from a Captain Obvious syndrome that you don't get too much over here. Reminding you of the score after every point, telling you exactly what just happened (actually we do get a bit of that here as well)... when you notice the commentators more than the match, something is wrong.
Yes, that is one of the major problems with commentating here. Although it does not pertain to those Top 4 commentators listed by Wertheim, who I would agree are probably our four best. Replace the senile and foolish Bud Collins with Mry Joe Fernandez to complete the Top 5. I'd definitely rank Carillo over J. McEnroe, though.
 
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