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> Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is great!
>
> Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back... or that you could crawl into a hole?
>
> Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....
>
>
> FIRST TESTIMONY:
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> I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow
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> and asked loudly,
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> "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?"
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> I turned around and walked back out and never went back
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> My husband didn't say a word...
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> he knew better.
>
>
> SECOND TESTIMONY:
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> I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls.
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> I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.
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> After browsing for several minutes,
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> I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen
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> who works at the store. He asked if he could help me.
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> Without thinking, I looked at him and said,
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> "I think I like playing with men's balls."
THIRD TESTIMONY:
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> My sister and I were at the mall and
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> passed by a store that sold a
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> variety of candy and nuts.
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> As we were looking at the display case,
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> the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
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> I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts."
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> My sister started to laugh hysterically.
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> The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away.
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> To this day,
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> my sister has never let me forget.
>
FOURTH TESTIMONY:
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>
> While in line at the bank one afternoon,
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> my toddler decided to release
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> some pent-up energy and ran amok.
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> I was finally able to grab hold of
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> her after receiving looks of disgust
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> and annoyance from other patrons.
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> I told her that if she did not start behaving
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> "right now" she would be punished.
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> To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a
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> voice just as threatening,
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> "If you don't let me go right now,
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> I will tell Grandma that I saw you
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> kissing Daddy's ***-*** last night!"
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> The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange.
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> Even the tellers stopped
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> what they were doing.
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> I mustered up the last of my dignity and
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> walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow.
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> The last thing I heard when
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> the door closed behind me,
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> were screams of laughter.
>
FIFTH TESTIMONY:
Have you ever asked your child a question too many times?
> Mythree-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training
and I was on him constantly.
One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch
in between errands.
It was very busy, with a full dining room.
While enjoying my taco,
I smelled something funny,
so of course I checked
my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean.
The realized that Danny
had not asked to go potty in a while.
I asked him if he needed to go,
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> and he said "No".
>
> I kept thinking
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> "Oh Lord, that child has had an
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> accident, and I don't have any clothes with me."
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> Then I said,
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> "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?"
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> "No," he replied.
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> I just KNEW that he must have had an accident,
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> because the smell was getting worse.
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> Soooooo, I asked one more time,
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> "Danny, did you have an accident?"
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> This time he jumped up,
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> yanked down his pants,
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> bent over,
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> spread his cheeks
> and yelled
> "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!"
> While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing,
> he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.
> An old couple made me feel better,
thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!
>
LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY:
>
>
> This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days
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> and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will,
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> in the future, likely think before she speaks.
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> What happens when you predict snow but don't get any!
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> We had a female news anchor that,
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> the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't,
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> turned to the weatherman and asked:
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> "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?"
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> Not only did HE have to leave the set,
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> but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
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>
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>
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> Now, didn't that feel good?
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> Pass it on to someone you know who needs a laugh
>
> and remember
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> we all say things we don't really mean,
>
> so think before you speak
Think before you speak...
Think before you speak...
Re: Think before you speak...
