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Old 12-03-2012, 01:41 PM   #46
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Default Re: Psychological Help and Self Help Thread. Come on in.

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thanks for the talk, i bitch about it a lot in the castle but never to outside ppl b/c they find it a dream job.
Lol, true I think I work on average 8-11 hours a day, 8 at my regular workplace and often few hours freelancing at home. I like it (otherwise I couldn't do it), but often I feel like I'm doing hardly anything but working and sleeping. Can't believe it's December already, I can remember clear as day watching Rafa-Nole AO finals in one window while working on some Word atrocity in another window, and AO 2013 is like month away
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Old 12-03-2012, 01:42 PM   #47
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Default Re: Psychological Help and Self Help Thread. Come on in.

It was difficult reading these troubled stories. It moved me so much that I just want to give all of you guys a hug
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Old 12-03-2012, 04:51 PM   #48
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Default Re: Psychological Help and Self Help Thread. Come on in.

This past year has probably been the worst of my life. I will be glad when 2012 draws to a close to be quite honest.

My aunt, who I was close to, got diagnosed with a terminal illness in October of last year and died in February. In the meantime, my mum went into a serious depression (combined with alcoholism), ended up ranting at me for hours upon end on a nightly basis, and there were several unsuccessful suicide attempts on her part. I didn't speak to anyone about it until recently and just let it bottle up - it's something I've done all my life.

As a result, I experienced a huge loss of self-esteem, my diet went out the window completely and I ballooned in weight. There were days in which I didn't get out of bed, and weeks in which I didn't leave the house. I didn't want to talk to anyone. Thus, the relationship with my ex-girlfriend deteriorated to a point in which I couldn't commit to her as I was such an emotional wreck and would have just brought her down. Now she's with someone else.

Funnily enough, though, her leaving me to shack up with someone else has been the trigger to sort my life out. The past 6 weeks, I've gotten my life back on track - joined the gym, regular exercise, improved my diet, and a bit of retail therapy. I've lost 7kg in the past month and feel 10000% better and I feel like I can start a conversation with anyone which is something I haven't been able to do for a while now. This is particularly useful for meeting new people, as most of my old friends have either moved away or are married/in a LTR which means I barely get to see them at all.

I have no idea whether my ex will come crawling back, but honestly I'm not entirely bothered, as I have to look after myself first and foremost.
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Old 12-03-2012, 06:27 PM   #49
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Default Re: Psychological Help and Self Help Thread. Come on in.

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This past year has probably been the worst of my life. I will be glad when 2012 draws to a close to be quite honest.

My aunt, who I was close to, got diagnosed with a terminal illness in October of last year and died in February. In the meantime, my mum went into a serious depression (combined with alcoholism), ended up ranting at me for hours upon end on a nightly basis, and there were several unsuccessful suicide attempts on her part. I didn't speak to anyone about it until recently and just let it bottle up - it's something I've done all my life.

As a result, I experienced a huge loss of self-esteem, my diet went out the window completely and I ballooned in weight. There were days in which I didn't get out of bed, and weeks in which I didn't leave the house. I didn't want to talk to anyone. Thus, the relationship with my ex-girlfriend deteriorated to a point in which I couldn't commit to her as I was such an emotional wreck and would have just brought her down. Now she's with someone else.

Funnily enough, though, her leaving me to shack up with someone else has been the trigger to sort my life out. The past 6 weeks, I've gotten my life back on track - joined the gym, regular exercise, improved my diet, and a bit of retail therapy. I've lost 7kg in the past month and feel 10000% better and I feel like I can start a conversation with anyone which is something I haven't been able to do for a while now. This is particularly useful for meeting new people, as most of my old friends have either moved away or are married/in a LTR which means I barely get to see them at all.

I have no idea whether my ex will come crawling back, but honestly I'm not entirely bothered, as I have to look after myself first and foremost.
that is alot of hardship in one year mate. Good to hear you are on your way back. It's commendable that you share this with us, especially since you said you are a person who bottles things up . I sincerely hope 2013 will be a better year for you!
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Old 12-03-2012, 11:18 PM   #50
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Speaking of psychological things. I've dipped into a bout of depression over school it seems. Finals are coming up and am stressing over grades and doing well; lets just say I'm not sitting comfortably in most my classes.

It's so weird, because this is the first time I have ever experienced depression... ever :/. I'm such a happy confident guy and school has never gotten to me before but for some reason I'm losing it

Words of encouragement anyone?
Still need encouraging? I saw you made a topic of this encouraging others

I used to stress over exams in high school and university but I developed the way of the warrior. To convince yourself that failure is not an option.

Your goals are your prey, and your mind is a sword. Your sword is unyielding, unbreakable, invincible and can slice through even the toughest of metals.

Exams are nothing. You should go all-out, do 5 hours work without breaks, focus your mind to the task at hand and do not waver good sir. Show no mercy.
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Old 12-03-2012, 11:23 PM   #51
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Yeah actually I got over the slump pretty quickly . I realized how petty it is to stress over exams, I have better things going for me then to worry about exams.
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Old 12-03-2012, 11:48 PM   #52
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Still need encouraging? I saw you made a topic of this encouraging others

I used to stress over exams in high school and university but I developed the way of the warrior. To convince yourself that failure is not an option.

Your goals are your prey, and your mind is a sword. Your sword is unyielding, unbreakable, invincible and can slice through even the toughest of metals.

Exams are nothing. You should go all-out, do 5 hours work without breaks, focus your mind to the task at hand and do not waver good sir. Show no mercy.
Dude. That. Is. Epic.

You definitely deserved way more than a first round exit at PopCon
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Old 12-04-2012, 01:15 AM   #53
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The effort was there man. At least I made it past qualifying
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Old 12-06-2012, 09:03 PM   #54
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that is alot of hardship in one year mate. Good to hear you are on your way back. It's commendable that you share this with us, especially since you said you are a person who bottles things up . I sincerely hope 2013 will be a better year for you!
Thanks, I've now come to terms with everything really, apart from the ex leaving (though I'll get closure in time). Counselling really helped me.
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Old 12-07-2012, 12:00 AM   #55
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Originally Posted by jmjhb View Post
This past year has probably been the worst of my life. I will be glad when 2012 draws to a close to be quite honest.

My aunt, who I was close to, got diagnosed with a terminal illness in October of last year and died in February. In the meantime, my mum went into a serious depression (combined with alcoholism), ended up ranting at me for hours upon end on a nightly basis, and there were several unsuccessful suicide attempts on her part. I didn't speak to anyone about it until recently and just let it bottle up - it's something I've done all my life.

As a result, I experienced a huge loss of self-esteem, my diet went out the window completely and I ballooned in weight. There were days in which I didn't get out of bed, and weeks in which I didn't leave the house. I didn't want to talk to anyone. Thus, the relationship with my ex-girlfriend deteriorated to a point in which I couldn't commit to her as I was such an emotional wreck and would have just brought her down. Now she's with someone else.

Funnily enough, though, her leaving me to shack up with someone else has been the trigger to sort my life out. The past 6 weeks, I've gotten my life back on track - joined the gym, regular exercise, improved my diet, and a bit of retail therapy. I've lost 7kg in the past month and feel 10000% better and I feel like I can start a conversation with anyone which is something I haven't been able to do for a while now. This is particularly useful for meeting new people, as most of my old friends have either moved away or are married/in a LTR which means I barely get to see them at all.

I have no idea whether my ex will come crawling back, but honestly I'm not entirely bothered, as I have to look after myself first and foremost.
well played mate.

I can tell from this post that you will be fine because you have balls.

keep it going.
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Old 12-07-2012, 12:22 AM   #56
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Default Re: Psychological Help and Self Help Thread. Come on in.

Stories like yours jmjhb, are the ones that benefit society. .

Not only is your life better, but others who read your story are motivated, regular posters and lurkers a like. Trust me it's true. It's like the one person in class asking the question everyone is thinking, secretly they are all thanking him or her for doing it.

For real though, Props Jmjhb! You will continue to grow and become a better person in 2013, I KNOW it!
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Old 12-07-2012, 12:37 AM   #57
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Default Re: Psychological Help and Self Help Thread. Come on in.

Was playing in a tournament last weekend. Won the first round 6-2, 6-3. 2nd round I won the first set 6-2, and had 30-15 in the first game of the 2nd set. I served, but didn't see where the ball landed. My arm/shoulder felt as though it ripped out of the socket or something, a recurrence of a long, long, long term injury, almost 4 year shoulder injury. I thought of retiring, but I had never and will never.

I started underhand serving, returning and closing the net, just played it out as I ended up losing 6-2, 0-6, 1-6. The bigger thing is that this shoulder has been bothering me forever and finally I thought I had it healed fully. I was playing well, starting to hit my stride and now this shit again. I cannot tell you how frustrating it is dealing with such an injury over so many years, some members of my family even my own mother telling me to quit and do something useful in my life while my soul tells me to keep fighting despite all odds and reasonable opinion.

So I must go on, continue to endure. Earlier today I was in the gym working on some arm exercises, and I came close to crying. Just not being able to overcome this after such a long time, KNOWING I can play with guys ranked like 5,000 ATP when healthy, but simply not being able to do so. I pray to God every day, every night, will it ever heal? And if it does, will it stay healed?
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Old 12-07-2012, 01:27 AM   #58
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Default Re: Psychological Help and Self Help Thread. Come on in.

Use the Scale Technique

Johnny Groove, people can tell you to follow your dreams and they are right...most of the time. Sometimes as humans we have to look at reality and look at other opportunities. If you believe 100% that you can become a tennis pro, regardless of injuries, then go for it man. More power to you. But if you put, other opportunities on the scale vs. tennis and find the other opportunities are more worthwhile then follow those.

If you find tennis isn't right for you then look at what else you love in life: Writing, Talking to others, managing numbers, whatever and try to pursue those.

Also if Tennis Pro fails, you can always look at other careers in tennis . Aka Writing for a Tennis newspaper with analysis etc. (If you are persistent enough you could get a job in such a field). Tennis coach/teacher at a club. Any ATP 5000 player could get this job pretty easy. Linesman. Working at a tennis shop. The possibilities are endless! Plus you don't have to lose your passion for tennis!

Kowchi's .02
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* Slams Do Not Exist!

Lenders: One thing people need to understand about this so-called weak era is that it was 'weak' for Federer on HC and grass and for Nadal on clay (Federer on clay too Nadal apart) because they were so much better than anyone else, for any outsider the era couldn't possibly be any harder, during 5+ years you had to either beat the best grass/HC player ever or the best clay player ever in every single Slam just to get 1 Slam title.
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Old 12-07-2012, 01:37 AM   #59
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Default Re: Psychological Help and Self Help Thread. Come on in.

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Use the Scale Technique

Johnny Groove, people can tell you to follow your dreams and they are right...most of the time. Sometimes as humans we have to look at reality and look at other opportunities. If you believe 100% that you can become a tennis pro, regardless of injuries, then go for it man. More power to you. But if you put, other opportunities on the scale vs. tennis and find the other opportunities are more worthwhile then follow those.

If you find tennis isn't right for you then look at what else you love in life: Writing, Talking to others, managing numbers, whatever and try to pursue those.

Also if Tennis Pro fails, you can always look at other careers in tennis . Aka Writing for a Tennis newspaper with analysis etc. (If you are persistent enough you could get a job in such a field). Tennis coach/teacher at a club. Any ATP 5000 player could get this job pretty easy. Linesman. Working at a tennis shop. The possibilities are endless! Plus you don't have to lose your passion for tennis!

Kowchi's .02
Ah, mate, I appreciate your opinion. Your thoughts are well thought out and lucid, helpful, and said in a friendly, agreeable tone.

And the thing is, I can't settle for that. If I am going to be in tennis, I need to be the greatest. I cannot be happy being a linesperson, I cannot be happy being the guy giving lessons to 40 year old housewives. I've worked at more than one tennis shop, I can't just sit there and watch people play all day while I'm there lusting for the game in the pro shop. I cannot be happy not being the best. When I am among tennis folk, when I am discussing, I feel as though they don't respect my opinion because they've coached this guy and that guy and this other guy used to train with so and so and I haven't. When this happens, and it does often, the feeling I get when confronted with this, a fire explodes in my eyes and passion runs through my blood to prove them wrong.

Nothing else in life gives me this same rush, and trust me, I've looked around.

Millions of guys have called it quits cause of injury, but I won't, and I can't. I've tried it even, come up with every excuse, but I couldn't live with myself, couldn't look at myself in the mirror knowing that I could still play and not giving it a shot.
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Old 12-07-2012, 03:41 AM   #60
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i hate my job, i rarely use the word hate but i really hate my job, im searching for a new one but It requires patience.
then i will have a new job i will be much more happy.
I am convinced that all jobs suck, of course none are as bad as mine. I think about quitting every single day. I've been there too long, it requires no skill, totally wastes my abilities and I peaked at the job unless I want to be in a supervisory position but I'd rather kill myself than be a supervisor at my job. The only possible benefit of being supervisor at my job would be that it would transform me into a tyrant and I've always wanted to try my hand at tyranny.
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