NINJA MISSION: TERRORIZE THE TERRORISTS IN THE DESERTS!!
Ninja was awaken from his sleep by Juliette his cow who licked his face till Ninja sat up. She was big and his tent was small which created obvious problems. Ninja is in the middle of the desert and on assignment. His services was employed by the US government. The Swiss since they are neutral really don’t have too much work to keep their agents busy, so they loan their agents out for a variety of missions to the rest of the western world.
Ninja is on a mission to fight terrorists who are trying to stir up disaster in one of the few democracies in the world located in Dubai. Walking out of his tent and giving Juliette fresh water from his canteen Ninja reflected on how he got out here in the middle of the desert. As soon as his plane landed down in Dubai, he felt something strange and sensed danger closing in. The airport was all but empty. It was just him and a big giant from Russia standing in his path. They dueled and fought and threw each other all around the airport waiting area. Ninja finally ended it by cracking Marat’s head on a pillar and left him lying there out like a light. Once Ninja was able to hail a cab down he thought he was safe, sadly he was wrong. The driver was a Spanish punk named Tommy Rebredo. He was taking Ninja on a wild ride to his death. The cab was zooming down the street, Ninja didn’t want to go where Tommy was taking him so he busted through the glass after many kicks and chopped the little punk to a state of unconsciousness; once he was out Ninja broke his window to the passenger side and flipped off the hood onto the street. The cab drove straight into a light pole and the Tommy was dead. Once Ninja made his way to his hotel room where his information was he was hoping to finally relax. He entered the room cautiously as he had always done mission after mission. When he closed the door, he heard the shower running. Ninja slowly approached the bathroom and guided the door open. He saw a man showering there. Ninja ran up and kicked him in the gut which sent this intruder against the wall in slamming fashion. Ninja then got in the shower himself and grabbed the shower hose, he wrapped it around his victim’s neck and began to squeeze. The man fought hard but Ninja with a head butt all but put him out. Soon after his hands dropped down and he was dead. Ninja searched the man’s pants on the bathroom floor to discover the man’s name was Andrei Pavel. A Romanian spy sent to stop Ninja from completing his mission. Ninja would have to be very careful from now on. He picked up the information that was under the bed sheet and was given an area to go to for further instructions.
Ninja followed the instructions and went to the desert. He followed the map and arrived at the meeting point. An USA agent by the name of Luke Jensen was there with a cow and supplies. Ninja was to go deep in the desert and destroy the terrorist camp there. The Spanish warrior Lopez was spotted on the grounds too. Ninja sensed that his enemies were on to him. Jerry introduced him to Juliette his cow. Ninja got on her back and she slowly started moving into the desert. When the moon came out Ninja stopped and pitched a tent. Juliette dine on wet grass and Ninja ate some paste for dinner. They slept after dinner for they both knew tomorrow was a dangerous day.
So now here we are, Ninja and Juliette up basking in the early morning desert sun enjoying their breakfast before setting out. Ninja packed up his tent and supplies after breakfast while Juliette decided this of all times was time to take another nap. After about a half and hour of yelling and pleading with Juliette to get her fat ass up and take him to the terrorist camp in the desert, she finally decided to get up since she really couldn’t take a nap with him yelling and screaming. The ride lasted about three hours, Juliette stopped when she heard gun fire off in the distance. Ninja got off and told her to stay; he ran across the sand to get a closer look at the camp. Ninja pulled out his garb from his bag and quickly changed into it so he could mix in with the enemy. He walked around the camp looking for the perfect place to put the bomb which would turn the camp into a parking lot. Ninja made his way into the center of the camp, he entered the tent. Barrels and barrels of chemicals and stacks of ammo along with many guns. Ninja placed the bomb behind the one barrel and made his way out of the tent. He slowly started to leave the camp when he was stopped by a European named Jarko. He asked Ninja who he was since he didn’t look familiar. Jarko was the accountant of the terrorist camp and he wanted to catch Ninja’s name. Instead his head caught a round house kick. As he dropped Ninja ran and the terrorists spotted him and chased after him. Lopez was ordering his man to kill him, but after Ninja was just outside the camp he pressed the switch on his remote and the camp was nothing more than just a giant fire. When Ninja made his way back to where Juliette was he saw that she was gone. He looked around and then went over the hill and sad her far away walking. Ninja had a feeling his partner was only going to continue to be problematic.
The two went to the private airport the next day so they could be flown back to Switzerland. The pilot said that the US needed Ninja for yet another mission. He was assigned breaking down another terrorist camp in the desert of Indian Wells California. Juliette was to be his partner and to carry him into the desert. Ninja and Juliette looked at each other unhappily. Ninja didn’t want her along and she well wanted to go back home to Gstaad. He let out a groan and she let out a moo. They got into the plane and flew out to the west coast.
The US agents stopped the car and got Juliette out of the trailer that the car was pulling. They were on the side of the road and right by the desert. Ninja hopped on her back and they rode off into the desert. As they got further into the desert, Ninja noticed three horsemen approaching; they circled him and jumped off their horses and launched their attack. Gonzo went first and swung his club at Ninja who ducked and then pulled out a dagger and sliced Gonzo’s gut. Gonzo went down and then Mardy Fish was next. He jumped on top of Ninja and was wrestling him to the ground. Ninja got behind him and grabbed a ninja star and drove it into Mardy’s temple. Now only one was left, Chela pulled out his saber and Ninja removed his sword and so the duel began. They fought onward for ten minutes; Juliette got so tired watching them that she laid down for a nap. Luckily for Ninja she wasn’t the only one getting tired. Chela started to slow down; the hot sun was getting to him. Ninja saw his chance and slashed in an upward movement which gashed about half of Chela’s face. Ninja let out a sigh and went to his canteen. He wasn’t happy that it took him more time to get Juliette back up on her feet than it did to kill those three enemies.
The two heroes travel over another hour before finally coming to the camp. Ninja knew he had to be very careful since they knew he was in the area. He was briefed on the plane ride that a British officer turned turncoat and was behind this camp and the next terrorist attack on the US. His named was Tim Henman and he was the main target for this mission. Ninja kept Juliette hidden and slowly approached the camp. He was wearing his garb as to hide himself. He knew he had to be quick about this as they were expecting the three men Ninja killed to come back. Ninja snuck into the camp and the men were all in the middle of training. He pulled the bomb out of his sack and place it in the tent where their were the chemicals and weapons. Ninja then ran far from the camp and detonated the bomb and the camp was blown to smithereens.
Ninja and Juliette rode back together but it was getting near dark so they were planning to stop to pitch a tent for the night. As they were about to stop they spotted a man near an oasis and he looked friendly enough so they went over by him to pitch the tent. This man was also wearing a garb and went over to help Ninja unpacked and set up for the night. Juliette went over to the oasis to drink some water. Ninja and the man began cooking dinner over the man’s fire. Ninja got up and went to check on his cow and as he was coming around back to the fire the man jumped out and began swinging a knife at Ninja. Ninja grabbed his arm and chopped the knife out of his hand and then round house kicked him in the back of the head. He fell to the ground and his head gear fell off. It was Tim Henman. Ninja ran as Tim was getting up and jumped kicked his target in the stomach and Tim flew many feet and started rolling on the ground like a piece of garbage. He was in pain and starting crawling, but little did he know that Juliette was just above him; before he could get up she just happened to pick this moment to rest her big fat ass and she dropped her big ass right on Tim’s face. Tim was kicking and trying to squirm out but couldn’t even budge his head an inch. Ninja causally walked up and complemented Juliette by saying “You finally did something right for once” then pulled out his sword and slowly started to thrust it into Tim’s stomach. He screams was muffed by the cow’s rear end but his arms and legs were moving faster than ever due to the pain. Suddenly blood began running out from under Juliette’s ass, but no it wasn’t that time of the month for her, it was blood from Tim’s mouth. He suddenly stopped moving and so that was the end of Ninja’s mission. He was so happy it was finally over. He managed to get his cow up and over to the fire for some dinner. Ninja was happy Tim’s food supply was full and so the two had a feast over the fire.
When they finally arrived home in Switzerland she went back to her farm in Gstaad and Ninja was thrown a party and given trophies from the defense department.
*I couldn't bring myself to cast Andre as a terrorist so he is not in this one, next time though I will find a role for him if they do meet again*
I hope you enjoyed it. Sorry it took so long.