My friend thought she was also asexual because she has been with this guy for 7 years or so and they have barely had sex and she never felt she needed it from him.. However, I always thought, how could they not have sex because she is hot as hell, or at least definitely out of his league. They started dating when she was in a really bad emotional time during high school and right after she got out of an abusive relationship, so I always felt she only dated him because she was desperate in that point in of her life. Because this guy never talks, they never do anything together, and they certainly don't have sex. She told my wife that in the past 7 months they had sex one time, and then finally this week they had sex again.. Really? I've been with my wife for 5 years and some days we have sex 3 or 4 times a day still (granted I'm a sex machine and my sex drive is a little abnormally high, or at least that is what I've been told by my shrink - I see a shrink once in a while just to get things off my chest and have my thoughts analyzed, nothing serious if you wanted to know).
Anyways, so I think in a way being with this rather really boring guy for so many years kind of shut her emotions down because similarly she became a recluse and rather mellow. However, in the past several months, she has been hanging out with us going out to clubs and actually doing things and she has all of a sudden had a sexual drive now and she actually socializes..while her boyfriend just complains about what she is doing. I mean this guy is seriously clueless. He talks about how he thinks drinking and stuff is pointless, yet he goes out and spends his money and buys Magic the Gathering playing cards and buying virtual game items
she says that when they go to a restaurant together, they don't even talk, they just eat. When they are at home, they only talk when it is necessary like "do we need to shop." What kind of shit is that.. Plus, no wonder she doesn't feel in the mood to have sex with him, according to her he is kind of small and isn't good in bed, and he doesn't like to talk about anything sexual (ironically he may the asexual one, but I think he just extremely introverted and idiotic..) I talked to the guy many times she he comes over with her ocassionally and he believes that the relationship he is having with her is the ideal way people should strive for, where it isn't necessary to talk with each other, or to have sex all the time, or to share money, nor is it necessary to do things with each other, all those are apparently superficial and extra to him... so then what the fuck is a relationship..? They have never used each other's money
In short, he practically bored her to death at a vulnerable time for her and she became too used to it and she ended up just settling. She even pointed out last week the only reason why should stays is because he won't ever leave.
Bit of a rage post, just makes me facepalm some of these people. I played tennis with this guy, and he is one lazy bastard on court.. He seriously lacks any motivation unless he is going to get negatively affected then he actually does something about it. Oh well, I'm sure she is going to finally end it by this month honestly.
Well, my point being, certainly there are asexual people out there, but I think there are a lot of people like this guy who are just plain boring and haven't really developed anything mentally for the real world.. He was an only child, his parents divorced when he was younger and he just stayed inside playing Magic the Gathering and video games. Literally his whole life. When they dated, it was seriously a winning lottery ticket that he didn't know what to do with, and with the girl being how she is just stayed.