Re: My eating habits.
You're attitude towards food is very negative. Essentially, cutting back after one or two indulgences does nothing for your weight and/or metabolism. In fact cutting back shocks your body into a fat preservation mode as it has had a minimal amount of caloires to fuel basic everyday functions. Essentially, I would say you do have a eating disorder of some sort, but it's good that you recognise this pattern of eating as potentially dangerous, understanding is the first stage of developing a healthy diet.
If you want to keep your weight down for purely cosmetic reasons then, calculate your BMR (base metabolic rate) then from that use a simple equation to calculate your calorie needs for a sedentry day, if you keep within your limit you will maintain and even lose a little weight. Calories in/Calories out is the fundamental rule of weight loss, you will have a set limit and anything over that limit you will begin to gain weight. For a healthy average man, the calorie needs falls in around 2200-2500 a day depending on height and weight. If you do a little exercise or even alot that amount increases and if you eat no more you will lose weight. Weight loss is a numbers game.
But my third point is, if you exercise moderately everyday (say, 30 mins a day) you will be able to eat a normal varied diet with some indulgences and not even have to worry about weight gain, don't beat yourself up over what is considered to be beautiful or not. Exercise, enjoy the good things in life and you'll be a more attractive person.
Hope this helps!