i'm letting go
Posted 12-05-2004 at 06:20 PM by damaged
As an American citizen I would like to apologize, in advance, for the destruction of your lovely country. As it bound to happen, the millions of US residents who can't imagine life in a country run by George Bush for another four years will be streaming across your borders like it was the Rio Grande. We will steal your jobs just for the free healthcare. I would also like to apologize that we will effectively have pissed off every country in the world by the end of the next four years which means we will most likely be nuked by some terrorist who managed to trade the right number of chickens for a Russian nuclear warhead in Cyechnezkkistanbul. I am reasonably certain that an atomic blast in New York City or Chicago would fuck your shit up, but hey, it's a weekend without snow so let's look on the bright side of things. Also, can you imagine how relaxing it must be to exist as a fine waxy ash on your living room wall? Finally, I apologize that Mr. Bush most likely does not know that Canada is not a hostile country, enemy combatant or whatever he is calling it these days. I am confident you will be named as part of a new "Axis of Evil" by our Royal Emperor along with such "evildoers" as France and Hawaii. Stealth aircraft will streak across your airspace late one night and by morning the entire country will look like the scene where Luke Skywalker finds his aunt and uncle smoldering in the desert after a Stormtrooper visit. The same things I love about America are the same things I hate about it. To paraphrase an earlier, unrelated blog, we as a nation are "young, white and don't give a fuck."