Dopingutra - 1001 silly/amazing ways to fail your drug tests (not on purpose) [Archive] - MensTennisForums.com

Dopingutra - 1001 silly/amazing ways to fail your drug tests (not on purpose)

Denaon
12-20-2005, 02:16 PM
Mariano Puerta took a sip from his wife's glass of water. And it was contaminated.

:secret:My guess is Mariano's wife wants him home with her all the time and decided to destroy his career.

Sesil Karatantcheva just wanted to have fun with the boys..she never imagined how bad playing with boys could be. Got pregnant, played RG/defeated Venus and aborted, at the age of 15.

Next doping allegations to come:

Andre Agassi starts hanging out with Mariano Hood, and borrows one of Hood's wigs. The wig's flooded with drugs (hair growth). Andre will test positive after reaching USO final and winning the trophy. L'Equipe will give the exclusive to the world.

amierin
12-20-2005, 02:21 PM
Next doping allegations to come:

Andre Agassi starts hanging out with Mariano Hood, and borrows one of Hood's wigs. The wig's flooded with drugs (hair growth). Andre will test positive after reaching USO final and winning the trophy. L'Equipe will give the exclusive to the world.

The USTA will then claim that wigs flooded with illegal substances are commonplace in tennis and that an American player is being singled out. They will then demand all the Spanish and South American players be tested for illegal hair products. Ivan Ljubicic will test positive. :devil:

sigmagirl91
12-20-2005, 02:21 PM
The USTA will then claim that wigs flooded with illegal substances are commonplace in tennis and that an American player is being singled out. They will then demand all the Spanish and South American players be tested for illegal hair products. Ivan Ljubicic will test positive. :devil:

:haha::haha:

keep_er_lit!
12-20-2005, 03:16 PM
The USTA will then claim that wigs flooded with illegal substances are commonplace in tennis and that an American player is being singled out. They will then demand all the Spanish and South American players be tested for illegal hair products. Ivan Ljubicic will test positive. :devil:

:yeah: :spit:

alfonsojose
12-20-2005, 08:05 PM
Ljubicic argued he had unprotected anal sex with a drunk tennis fan. "He called himself Rducky or something" the croatian said.

El Legenda
12-20-2005, 08:11 PM
Ljubicic argued he had unprotected anal sex with a drunk tennis fan. "He called himself Rducky or something" the croatian said.

You're trying to hard now, i think everyone knows that you are gay :wavey:

sigmagirl91
12-20-2005, 08:15 PM
You're trying to hard now, i think everyone knows that you are gay :wavey:

You miss!! :o

TheMightyFed
12-21-2005, 07:25 AM
These excuses are just pathetic... I'm still waiting for the first professional athlete who gets caught and immediately says in a press conference:

"OK, the temptation was too strong, I wanted the fame and money, and I thougt it would be easier to overcome adversity, sponsor pressure and physical tireness taking a few pills. I got caught, I'm totally responsible for what happened and I apologize to my fans. Life goes on, at least I won't put my health at risk anymore..."

This athlete is not yet born I think, and we'lle get some good laughs in the future, like "I took some pills while I was asleep" or stuff like that...