The Joaquin Appreciation Thread #1 [Archive] - Page 8 - MensTennisForums.com

The Joaquin Appreciation Thread #1

Pages : 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 [8] 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20

mandoura
06-19-2005, 05:58 PM
23- #Error#

mandoura
06-19-2005, 05:58 PM
24- Enter maximum amount

mandoura
06-19-2005, 05:59 PM
25- Cross fingers

mandoura
06-19-2005, 05:59 PM
26- Take cash

mandoura
06-19-2005, 05:59 PM
27- Go back to the car

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:00 PM
28- Check make-up in rear mirror

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:00 PM
29- Look for keys in handbag

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:01 PM
30- Start car

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:01 PM
31- Drive 50 meters

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:01 PM
32- STOP

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:02 PM
33- Drive back to bank machine

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:02 PM
34- Go out of the car

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:02 PM
35- Take card back from machine

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:03 PM
36- Go back to the car

jackieglover
06-19-2005, 06:03 PM
We are way ahead of schedule :yeah:

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:03 PM
37- Throw card on passenger seat

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:03 PM
38- Check make-up in rear mirror

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:04 PM
39- Manually check haircut

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:04 PM
40- Go into roundabout - wrong way

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:04 PM
41- BREAK

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:05 PM
42- Go into roundabout - right way

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:05 PM
43- Drive 5 kilometers

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:06 PM
44- Release hand break

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:07 PM
Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:07 PM
Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a bellybutton.

jackieglover
06-19-2005, 06:08 PM
Premature celebration :aparty: Better than a premature :tape:

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:08 PM
People do not get sick from cold weather; it's from being indoors a lot more.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:09 PM
When you sneeze, all bodily functions stop even your heart!

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:10 PM
Babies are born without knee caps. They don't appear until they are 2-6 yo.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:10 PM
The average person over fifty will have spent 5 years waiting in lines.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:12 PM
The toothbrush was invented in 1498.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:12 PM
The average housefly lives for one month.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:13 PM
40,000 Americans are injured by toilets each year.

jackieglover
06-19-2005, 06:13 PM
Why pay for college when you can get all you need right here ;)

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:13 PM
A coat hanger is 44 inches long when straightened.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:13 PM
The average computer user blinks 7 times a minute.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:14 PM
Your feet are bigger in the afternoon than the rest of the day.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:15 PM
John Travolta turned down the starring roles in "An Officer and a Gentleman" and "Tootsie."

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:15 PM
Michael Jackson owns the rights to the South Carolina State anthem.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:16 PM
In most television commercials advertising milk, a mixture of white paint and a little thinner is used in place of the milk.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:16 PM
Most hospitals make money by selling the umbilical cords cut from women who give birth. They are reused in vein transplant surgery.

jackieglover
06-19-2005, 06:17 PM
In most television commercials advertising milk, a mixture of white paint and a little thinner is used in place of the milk.

I'd drink that, they should just do honest advertising.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:17 PM
Humphrey Bogart was related to Princess Diana. They were 7th cousins.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:17 PM
If coloring weren't added to Coca-Cola, it would be green.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:20 PM
Some "assicons":

(_!_) a regular ass

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:20 PM
(__!__) a fat ass

jackieglover
06-19-2005, 06:20 PM
Too fast for me today. My multitask skills are dropping.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:21 PM
(!) a tight ass

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:21 PM
(_*_) a sore ass

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:21 PM
{_!_} a swishy ass

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:22 PM
(_o_) an ass hole

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:22 PM
(_x_) kiss my ass

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:23 PM
(_X_) leave my ass alone

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:23 PM
(_zzz_) a tired ass

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:23 PM
(_o^^o_) a wise ass

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:24 PM
( _ E=mc2_) a smart ass

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:24 PM
(_$_) Money coming out of his ass

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:25 PM
(_?_) Dumb Ass

jackieglover
06-19-2005, 06:25 PM
( _ E=mc2_) a smart ass

:haha:

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:27 PM
:haha:
;)

jackieglover
06-19-2005, 06:30 PM
I really need to win this tourney I'm in right now. The 25k would be sweet :D

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 06:32 PM
Mando -too funny
JG- what are you betting on now?

jackieglover
06-19-2005, 06:37 PM
Mando -too funny
JG- what are you betting on now?

Playing some online poker today. Made a little bit in the morning, now playing in a random tourney, 25k to the winner.

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 06:39 PM
Playing some online poker today. Made a little bit in the morning, now playing in a random tourney, 25k to the winner.

Wow that is a quick hunk of change! Good luck then!

Becarina
06-19-2005, 06:39 PM
Becky, I am enjoyin all this coffee info because I am a Tea person. Why are you enjoying it sweetie? Are you planning to marry a Saudi guy? ;)


nah, just think it is interesting :p

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:48 PM
I really need to win this tourney I'm in right now. The 25k would be sweet :D

Good Luck.

Have a new project too. Will PM all of you later for some advice. :)

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:51 PM
Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaved toddler was Ms. Robertson's son!

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:52 PM
Carl Truman, a 19-year-old man from Los Angeles, won $74,000 and medical expenses when his neighbour ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbour's hub caps.

jackieglover
06-19-2005, 06:52 PM
Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaved toddler was Ms. Robertson's son!

True story?

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 06:53 PM
Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaved toddler was Ms. Robertson's son!

If this is true I think that I will be sick :rolleyes: But I bet they are true.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:54 PM
Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days.
He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He
sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of $500,000.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:54 PM
Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbour's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who was
shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:55 PM
Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, was awarded $113,500. A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

jackieglover
06-19-2005, 06:56 PM
http://www.armchairempire.com/images/classics/larry-7/larry-7-love-sail-1.jpg

mandoura
06-19-2005, 06:58 PM
If this is true I think that I will be sick :rolleyes: But I bet they are true.

I got those from a friend, way back, in an e-mail, inviting me to move to the states. He was asking for any suggestions we might have to earn a Stella Award. :lol:

The Stella Awards

The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonald's. That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous lawsuits in the United States.

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 07:02 PM
LOL! Well move to the states anyway even if some of the folk here have no scruples!!!

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:03 PM
Hello again my dear friends!!!! :)

jackie: GL with Poker :yeah:

mandoura
06-19-2005, 07:04 PM
Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a night club in a neighbouring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies' room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

Becarina
06-19-2005, 07:04 PM
LOL! Well move to the states anyway even if some of the folk here have no scruples!!!
:yeah:

mandoura
06-19-2005, 07:05 PM
Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On his first trip home, having driven onto the freeway, he set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go into the back and make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the R.V. left the freeway, crashed, and overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him in the owner's manual that he couldn't actually do this. The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new motor home. The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this new suit, just in case there were any other complete morons buying their recreational vehicles.

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:06 PM
I'm about to be ready to tell you the wonderful story of Massaoud the cobbler

Becarina
06-19-2005, 07:08 PM
I'm about to be ready to tell you the wonderful story of Massaoud the cobbler


cannot wait, the anticipation has been building for hours :p

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:08 PM
Massaoud the cobbler (Sahat al Zein)

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:08 PM
This is the story of a cobbler who was really weird...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:09 PM
His name was Massaoud, he had a hut , he was working and sleeping in it.

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:09 PM
But that was normal... Everybody was living the same way...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:09 PM
But when somebody was bringing shoes to repair....

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:10 PM
Massaoud was taking the shoe... he was driving a nail in it... He was climbing on the hill near his hut... He was staring at the sky...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:10 PM
And then he was going down back to his hut... was driving another nail in the shoe... climbing on the hill ... staring at the sky...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:11 PM
going back down to his hut... driving a nail in the shoe...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:11 PM
And so on, all day long...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:11 PM
People of the village say that he has not always been like that... They say that a long time ago, Massaoud was like everybody...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:12 PM
He was waking up in the morning... Was climbing on the hill... Making his prayers...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:12 PM
And since he was not married, He was asking God to send him a wife...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:12 PM
And then he was going back to his hut working all the day like everybody...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:13 PM
But there was one day, while Massaoud was doing his prayer, a huge eagle caught him by the shoulders...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:13 PM
The eagle went through a desert... then a sea... another desert... another sea...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:13 PM
And let Massaoud at the entrance of a town...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:14 PM
That was a town that Massaoud didnot know...

allanah
06-19-2005, 07:14 PM
Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaved toddler was Ms. Robertson's son!


That's so outrageous it has to be true :eek:

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:14 PM
But the town was beautiful...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:15 PM
Massaoud started to walk...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:15 PM
In a street, he saw two persons meeting each other...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:15 PM
And the two persons told each other "Sahat al Zein"...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:16 PM
that could be translated by "This is wonderful"...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:16 PM
And Massaoud told himself: "This is probably their way to say hello to each other..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:17 PM
He continued to walk...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:17 PM
In a street, he saw a butcher's shop and a woman entering the butcher's shop...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:18 PM
The woman took some meat and said "Sahat al Zein, Sahat al Zein, Sahat al Zein, Sahat al Zein, Sahat al Zein" five times...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:18 PM
And the woman went out of the shop with the meat in her hands...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:18 PM
And Massaoud started to be a bit sceptical...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:19 PM
He continued to walk in another street and saw a cobbler like him...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:19 PM
He saw a man entering at the cobbler's...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:19 PM
The man took the new shoes and said "Sahat al Zein, Sahat al Zein, Sahat al Zein..." 20 times...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:20 PM
And the man went out of the shop with the new shoes in his hands...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:20 PM
And Massaoud was getting really really confused...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:21 PM
Massaoud went in the cobbler's shop and said : "Well, I'm a stranger... I 've just arrived in this town and since this morning I only see weird things happening.."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:21 PM
The other cobbler said: "But what did you see?"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:22 PM
Massaoud answered : "Well, since this morning I see people buying things without paying... People don't pay..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:22 PM
The other cobbler said : "But what do you mean, they don't pay???..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:22 PM
Massaoud said: "I saw this last man taking the shoes..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:23 PM
The cobbler burst out laughing...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:23 PM
And said: "This man paid the price... The cost of these shoes was 20 "Sahat al Zein", the man said 20 "Sahat al Zein"...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:23 PM
Massaoud said: "But what about money???"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:24 PM
The other answered: "Ah no... in this town, in this town we don't need money..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:24 PM
"Everybody buys and everybody sells by saying "Sahat al Zein" "

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:25 PM
Massaoud, who was a bit mistrustful, said to the other cobbler: "So now, if I go to the bakery and I say 20 Sahat al Zein, I'll be given a cake???"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:25 PM
"No... You have not understood... You go to the bakery: You say two times Sahat al Zein, you get a cake..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:25 PM
"You say one Sahat al Zein... you get an apple, an orange or a banana."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:26 PM
Massaoud said: "But that's wonderful!!! Can I stay in this town?"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:26 PM
The cobbler answered : "Of course, you can. Everybody can... there is only one condition: In this town, everybody buys what he needs, not less, not more..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:26 PM
"If you need two apples, you buy two apples... not three or there won't be enough for the other people but not one too..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:27 PM
"If you need one bread, you buy one... not two not a half...And you'll be allowed to stay as long as you want"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:27 PM
Massaoud said: "There is still one problem... I'm a cobbler too... Is there a job for me in this town?"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:27 PM
The other told him : "Really , you fall from the sky... I have so much work to do that you can stay here working with me..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:28 PM
And Massaoud accepted...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:28 PM
And started to work the very same day...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:29 PM
He hired a little house that he used to leave early in the morning...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:29 PM
He was working til noon and then to the market to buy his food ...

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 07:29 PM
Jerome I am dying here.....

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:30 PM
And go back home...

Becarina
06-19-2005, 07:30 PM
Jerome I am dying here.....


:lol: I was just thinking the same

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:30 PM
Massaoud was happy...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:30 PM
He was happy like that for a year...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:31 PM
After a year, one day he arrived at his work a bit embarassed...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:31 PM
And his boss, who had became his friend in the meantime, asked him : "What's happening to you, Massaoud?"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:32 PM
"You want to go back to your country?"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:32 PM
Massaoud said: "Oh no, not at all!! I'm so happy in this town that I want to marry a woman..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:33 PM
"But I don't know the tradition here and I don't know how it works..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:33 PM
The other said: "But Massaoud you know, in this town, everything is very simple.."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:33 PM
"In the town, every young woman who wants to marry with a man goes to the beach every thursday..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:34 PM
"They walk there with a pitcher full of water on their head"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:34 PM
"On next thursday, go to the beach Massaoud... If there is one young woman you really like, go talk to her and ask her some water.."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:34 PM
"If the woman gives you water to drink, that means she agrees to marry you"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:35 PM
"If not, you have to find another one"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:35 PM
Massaoud waited until Thursday...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:36 PM
He picked his most beautiful clothes and went to the beach...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:36 PM
There were lots of young women there walking...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:36 PM
They were all very beautiful...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:37 PM
And there was one girl that Massaoud really liked...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:37 PM
He came to her, started to talk to her ...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:38 PM
And Massaoud who was really shy, dared to ask her some water...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:38 PM
And the young woman accepted...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:38 PM
So Massaoud and the young woman got married...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:39 PM
Massaoud hired a bit bigger house but kept his habits...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:39 PM
He was leaving his house in the morning, working until noon, going to the market and back home...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:40 PM
But one day Massaoud had finished to work... and on the market, he saw a huge fish, a wonderful fish...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:41 PM
He thought: " That's extraordinary... with this fish, my wife will make me some very good meals..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:41 PM
"I will eat some, night and day, for at least three weeks..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:41 PM
He asked the seller: "How much does this fish cost?"

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:42 PM
The seller answered: "Be careful, this fish is huge and costs 50 "Sahat al Zein""

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:42 PM
And Massaoud couldn't stop himself...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:42 PM
He started to say "Sahat al Zein, Sahat al Zein,Sahat al Zein, Sahat al Zein..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:43 PM
And when he had finished to say 50 times Sahat al Zein, the seller told him:"This fish is yours, you can take it..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:43 PM
Massaoud took the fish...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:43 PM
The fish was so big that Massaoud had to carry the fish on his head...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:44 PM
But he was so happy thinking of all the meals his wife will make for him...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:44 PM
That even before arriving back home he was calling for his wife...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:44 PM
When the wife opened the door and saw Massaoud with this huge fish on his head, she said:

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:45 PM
"Poor Massaoud, you didn't have the right to do that..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:45 PM
"In this town, everybody buys what he needs, never less, never more..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:46 PM
" and this fish is so big that it could feed tens of families when we are only two people..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:46 PM
"In this city, you're not allowed to do that..."

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:46 PM
As soon as his wife had finished her speech, the eagle was back and caught Massaoud by the shoulders...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:47 PM
Went through a sea, a desert, another sea, another desert and let Massoud in front of his old hut...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:47 PM
And people of the village say that's since this day that Massaoud drives a nail in the shoe, climbs on the hill, stares at the sky...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:48 PM
goes back down to his hut, drives a nail, climbs on the hill, stares at the sky...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:48 PM
But the eagle,

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:48 PM
the eagle never came back...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:48 PM
This story is finished...

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:49 PM
:angel:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 07:50 PM
well, that took awhile....

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 07:51 PM
Jerome? Can I come back now?

Becarina
06-19-2005, 07:51 PM
Jerome? Can I come back now?


:haha: was not a bad story :)

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 07:53 PM
Probably not but when your head is bigger than your body and on fluid overload- one's attention span is short

jayrhum
06-19-2005, 07:55 PM
Well not the kind of reactions I expected but hey that makes some more posts for this thread...

Sorry if I took the thread in hostage.

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 07:59 PM
Well not the kind of reactions I expected but hey that makes some more posts for this thread...

Sorry if I took the thread in hostage.

No it was fine. It is me. But holding threads hostage seems to be a common concern lately ;)

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:06 PM
No it was fine. It is me. But holding threads hostage seems to be a common concern lately ;)

Tell me about it. :rolleyes:

jackieglover
06-19-2005, 08:15 PM
wtf happened here? Missed another milestone :smash:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:18 PM
wtf happened here? Missed another milestone :smash:

:p

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:23 PM
May your glass be ever full.
May the roof over your head be always strong.
And may you be in heaven
half an hour before the devil knows you're dead

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:24 PM
Here's a toast to your enemies' enemies! :drink:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:24 PM
When we drink, we get drunk.
When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
So, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven!

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:28 PM
You must live with a person to know a person. If you want to know me come and live with me. - it is an Irish Proverb not an invite :ras:

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:28 PM
May your glass be ever full.
May the roof over your head be always strong.
And may you be in heaven
half an hour before the devil knows you're dead

Amen :angel:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:30 PM
A cough releases an explosive charge of air that moves at speeds up to 60 mph.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:31 PM
You must live with a person to know a person. If you want to know me come and live with me. - it is an Irish Proverb not an invite :ras:

:sad: I thought we were all happy living together.

Guys, any of you have people on a blacklist for no-rep-back? :mad: And what is your criteria?

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:31 PM
A fetus acquires fingerprints at the age of three months

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 08:31 PM
Ok I am definitely having trouble with the MSN messenger service. Does anyone know which thread Sol gave me that infomation in? Was it the Den? I am really exhausted today :eek:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:31 PM
for jackie :

A healthy individual releases 3.5 oz. of gas in a single flatulent emission, or about 17 oz. in a day.

:lol:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:32 PM
:sad: I thought we were all happy living together.

Guys, any of you have people on a blacklist for no-rep-back? :mad: And what is your criteria?


We are happy, I think ;)

Hmm...not really a black list that I know of, you?

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:33 PM
According to the Kinsey Institute, the biggest erect penis on record measures 13 inches. The smallest tops off at 1 3/4 inches.

:haha:

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:34 PM
We are happy, I think ;)

Hmm...not really a black list that I know of, you?

No, not yet, but am thinking of creating one. ;)

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:35 PM
No, not yet, but am thinking of creating one. ;)


i hope I am not on it :scared: tennischick never repped me back, and a few others, but I usually just dont rep them anymore :p

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:36 PM
According to the Kinsey Institute, the biggest erect penis on record measures 13 inches. The smallest tops off at 1 3/4 inches.

:haha:

That's a very offensive and racist post.

:lol:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:37 PM
Most men have erections every hour to hour and a half during sleep

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:38 PM
That's a very offensive and racist post.

:lol:


:haha:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:39 PM
On average women say 7,000 words per day. Men manage just over 2000 :lol:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:39 PM
this is sad....

The average duration of sexual intercourse for humans is 2 minutes

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:41 PM
i hope I am not on it :scared: tennischick never repped me back, and a few others, but I usually just dont rep them anymore :p

Many did not rep me back but I did not expect them to. Most of those are tennis related rep and usually they don't rep back unless you overwhelm them with a knock out post, which is not very often. :D

I was thinking about people who really care about this rep stuff, are very eager to get a good rep, claim they rep back, but don't ptactice what they preach. I usually consider them out after 3 strikes. :)

My problem is I keep forgetting who they are. :rolleyes:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:42 PM
:lol: just look for the rep whores, I know a few :rolleyes:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:44 PM
The human brain is about 85% water

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:45 PM
The average human body contains enough: iron to make a 3 inch nail, sulfur to kill all fleas on an average dog, carbon to make 900 pencils, potassium to fire a toy cannon, fat to make 7 bars of soap, phosphorous to make 2,200 match heads, and water to fill a ten-gallon tank.

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 08:45 PM
Ok since we are chatting here- I have downloaded but my internet security system isn;t letting me in so I am exasperated with this. So - 2 minutes you say on average? Holy ....

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:46 PM
A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (Anyone wants to be a pig in his/her next life?)

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:46 PM
you are trying to get MSN?

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:47 PM
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months, and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat up one cup of coffee. (Worth it?)

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:48 PM
A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (Anyone wants to be a pig in his/her next life?)


:haha: no....

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:49 PM
The average human body contains enough: iron to make a 3 inch nail, sulfur to kill all fleas on an average dog, carbon to make 900 pencils, potassium to fire a toy cannon, fat to make 7 bars of soap, phosphorous to make 2,200 match heads, and water to fill a ten-gallon tank.

Will I get paid if I donnate all this?

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 08:50 PM
you are trying to get MSN?

I have it downloaded but it won't recognize me to chat- says that I am not connected to the internet.

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:51 PM
ugh, I know nothing about computers, I have been trying to give jg a virus for mnths but cannot figure it out :ras:

kidding

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:51 PM
for jackie :

A healthy individual releases 3.5 oz. of gas in a single flatulent emission, or about 17 oz. in a day.

:lol:

If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (That's more like it)

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:53 PM
I have it downloaded but it won't recognize me to chat- says that I am not connected to the internet.

Try to find "connect" in file or tools and click it even if you are connected.

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:55 PM
ugh, I know nothing about computers, I have been trying to give jg a virus for mnths but cannot figure it out :ras:

kidding

Leave it to me. :aplot:

Not kidding. :haha:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 08:56 PM
Leave it to me. :aplot:

Not kidding. :haha:


:haha: sometimes muffins just arent enough eh?

mandoura
06-19-2005, 08:58 PM
:haha: sometimes muffins just arent enough eh?

Smart girl. ;)

Becarina
06-19-2005, 09:04 PM
Dr. Seuss wrote "Green Eggs and Ham" after his editor dared him to write a book using fewer than 50 different words

Becarina
06-19-2005, 09:04 PM
Frank Baum named "Oz" after a file cabinet in his office. One cabinet was labeled "A to N," and the second was labeled "O to Z."

Becarina
06-19-2005, 09:06 PM
Smart girl. ;)


people keep telling me that ;)

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 09:06 PM
Ok I think I go it now! Mandoura you are now on my contact list- so does this mean we can chat at some point? Cool

Becarina
06-19-2005, 09:10 PM
I believe you got it :)

Becarina
06-19-2005, 09:10 PM
I am bored :rolleyes:

cobalt60
06-19-2005, 09:13 PM
Yep and on that note I have to leave. :-(

Becarina
06-19-2005, 09:14 PM
oh, well see ya later :wavey:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 09:16 PM
think I will leave also, bye bye :wavey:

mandoura
06-19-2005, 09:16 PM
I am bored :rolleyes:

Write your name on a piece of paper and then tear it up. :)

It usually works for me. I am ready to shoot myself afterwards. ;)

Becarina
06-19-2005, 09:17 PM
ive been ready to shoot myself for hours ;)

Becarina
06-19-2005, 09:18 PM
please send me a muffin and end my misery :lol:

Becarina
06-19-2005, 09:25 PM
my friend made a cake, should work as well

:wavey:

mandoura
06-19-2005, 09:40 PM
:wavey: :hug: