Best Excuses if Gaudio wins a set or a match in Houston [Archive] - MensTennisForums.com

Best Excuses if Gaudio wins a set or a match in Houston

FryslanBoppe
11-08-2004, 05:43 AM
From reading some of the threads and points here predicting how bad Gaudio is going to perform at Houston. At least Egg's was funny thinking he would do as bad as Berasategui did in 94.

So if the moment comes if Gaudio wins a set, let alone a match. I wonder what the plethora of excuses will be seen here on MTF. Please free to add variations of the excuses.

1. Federer - Oh! it's Roger's first match after his layoff and he got caught cold, and Gaudio was able to take advantage of the situation.

2. Roddick- They should drug and blood test Gaudio as he is a cheating Argentine, who must be on some illegal substance.

3. Hewitt - He only peeled the Potato because he is broken hearted and is more interested in Golovin rather than tennis.

4. Safin - Marat is just an OAF, and he is tired from playing and winning too many recent matches.

5. Moya - He has his mind focused on the Davis Cup final and is only using Houston as a warm-up for the match in Sevilla.

6. Coria - He is still injured and hasn't played for 6 months. This one at least has some legitimacy, but he really shouldn't be playing, if he is not up to it.

7. Henman - Not applicable as that would mean they would have to meet in the semis and we know Gaston is making it that far.

8. Alternates - They arrived too late, they weren't match tough and couldn't get used to the court conditions.

drf716
11-08-2004, 05:51 AM
so i think just bcoz you won a grand slam doesn't mean you have to qualify for the top 8... you have to be consistent all year round

Daniel
11-08-2004, 06:00 AM
he has been consistent and he deserves his spot in the Masters Cup, at least he got a GS in 2004 , something the other 6 players dont have

Fondueischguät
11-08-2004, 06:02 AM
so i think just bcoz you won a grand slam doesn't mean you have to qualify for the top 8... you have to be consistent all year round

How is that answering the respective thread question? There is a rule there and has been there since the end of the Grand Slam Cup and it's not the first time either that it has been implemented see the year 2002 with Johansson and Costa.

To answer the thread question another generic excuse could be.
What is he doing there, he shouldn't have qualified and doesn't deserve to be there, that will come out if he manages to win a set or a match.

WyveN
11-08-2004, 06:37 AM
so i think just bcoz you won a grand slam doesn't mean you have to qualify for the top 8... you have to be consistent all year round

Marat hasn't been consistent the whole year either.

FryslanBoppe
11-08-2004, 06:41 AM
Marat hasn't been consistent the whole year either.

Wouldn't only Federer qualify if consistency was the only criteria? Then again Roddick was consistent when it came to playing on clay in Europe.

Chloe le Bopper
11-08-2004, 06:47 AM
Don't forget about Roddick's injuries and bad haircut. I'm not sure how the latter would work it's way into a loss, but we'll find a way!

Chloe le Bopper
11-08-2004, 06:48 AM
Also, Moya has been inured lately. If Gaudio snags a set it will be because Moya was serving like Elena Dementieva.

FryslanBoppe
11-08-2004, 06:51 AM
Thanks Becca and I know Moya has been injured, but Coria has the injury excuse lined up and for the interest of fairness I decided to use the Davis Cup one.

You mean Elena Dementieva second serves don't you Rebecca.

Chloe le Bopper
11-08-2004, 06:52 AM
Yes, of course!

Chloe le Bopper
11-08-2004, 06:53 AM
Or maybe Gaudio will snag a set from Roddick because Roddick's mind will be on Davis Cup... the Moya excuse works for him too!

WyveN
11-08-2004, 06:53 AM
Dont forget all the excuses if Gaudio manages to win a dead rubber match

FryslanBoppe
11-08-2004, 06:57 AM
Yes, it's a dead rubber and it doesn't matter or it was a deliberate tactic to avoid playing a particular player from the other group.

FryslanBoppe
11-08-2004, 06:58 AM
Or maybe Gaudio will snag a set from Roddick because Roddick's mind will be on Davis Cup... the Moya excuse works for him too!

My bad, you have got me right, but somehow I don't see Roddick and 2 claycourt victories in a row against good players as manageable.

Chloe le Bopper
11-08-2004, 07:00 AM
My bad, you have got me right, but somehow I don't see Roddick and 2 claycourt victories in a row against good players as manageable.
You never said that the excuses couldn't be delusional! Besides.. maybe he'll be stressed out over what type of diaper to wear for when he has to face 20 000 people chanting against him? :angel:

FryslanBoppe
11-08-2004, 07:06 AM
You never said that the excuses couldn't be delusional! Besides.. maybe he'll be stressed out over what type of diaper to wear for when he has to face 20 000 people chanting against him? :angel:

Very true, many of the excuses probably will be delusional. Hence the drug reference and some of the others listed.

It will be good to see this thread if the moment comes when he wins a match or a set.

The diaper scenario is scary and I so want him to act like a Duck, they have many game recipes in Spain.

Chloe le Bopper
11-08-2004, 07:10 AM
Well, if they broke down Hewitt, one would think that they'll break down Roddick if he acts up. That said, maybe he will prove to be stronger than Hewitt was. We'll see! Well, you guys will. I don't have coverage :p

Chloe le Bopper
11-08-2004, 07:11 AM
Another reason that Gaudio may take a set off Hewitt: Hewitt will be stressing to cover up the latest rumours that have surfaced regarding his sexuality and will not be focussed on the match.

FryslanBoppe
11-08-2004, 07:12 AM
The court case against the ATP is coming up and Hewitt has his mind defending himself against these allegations.

WyveN
11-08-2004, 08:42 AM
Roddick lost to Gaudio to prepare for the experience of losing to good clay court players in DC.

drf716
11-08-2004, 09:11 AM
[QUOTE=Fondueischguät]There is a rule there and has been there since the end of the Grand Slam Cup and it's not the first time either that it has been implemented see the year 2002 with Johansson and Costa.[QUOTE]
yeah i know... :cool:
___
although i dont think you can think of someone more deserving of those spots or those who don't can you?

Neely
11-08-2004, 10:02 AM
You can add me to the list of people that think that Gaudio is the worst Masters Cup player of the complete field because he doesn't have any results on non-clay courts.
But yes, his chances to win a match(es) are good as never before because virtually everybody else (maybe except Henman/Safin at the moment) has/had problems of any sort.

I'm sure a convenient excuse can be found ;) :smoke:

sigmagirl91
11-08-2004, 10:53 AM
"Roddick first-serve percentage dropped in that second set".
"Federer's forehand is missing the target".
"Marat's head is just not in this match".

Horatio Caine
11-08-2004, 10:58 AM
Wouldn't only Federer qualify if consistency was the only criteria? Then again Roddick was consistent when it came to playing on clay in Europe.

:haha: :haha:

Horatio Caine
11-08-2004, 11:00 AM
Also, Moya has been inured lately. If Gaudio snags a set it will be because Moya was serving like Elena Dementieva.

He does though because he has a sort of curtsy in his service action! :lol:

Horatio Caine
11-08-2004, 11:01 AM
Yes, it's a dead rubber and it doesn't matter or it was a deliberate tactic to avoid playing a particular player from the other group.

:lol:

Horatio Caine
11-08-2004, 11:04 AM
If Gaston is so inferior do you think the rest of the players will all try to avoid standing next to him when they have the photoshoot (when they are dressed up in suits etc)? Of course we the viewers wouldn't know why (!) - maybe he let out a silent, but really deadly fart! I guess the chilli con carne didn't go down too well from last night Gaston! :lol:

sigmagirl91
11-08-2004, 11:10 AM
If Gaston is so inferior do you think the rest of the players will all try to avoid standing next to him when they have the photoshoot (when they are dressed up in suits etc)? Of course we the viewers wouldn't know why (!) - maybe he let out a silent, but really deadly fart! I guess the chilli con carne didn't go down too well from last night Gaston! :lol:

Oh....my.... :eek: :eek:

Black Adam
11-08-2004, 05:09 PM
does that mean there will be less than a 1000 american supporters in seville :confused:
is seville a stadium with flood light by the way coz i am wondering if there are match that end at 22h59 will they postpone the matches?

Horatio Caine
11-08-2004, 05:11 PM
does that mean there will be less than a 1000 american supporters in seville :confused:
is seville a stadium with flood light by the way coz i am wondering if there are match that end at 22h59 will they postpone the matches?

Don't worry the matches won't last until 23:00hr. Roddick will be safely battered into submission within 90 minutes and Fish 89 minutes. Maybe the Americans would prefer to get it all over with as quickly as possible - take the motorway option: Ginepri - 45 minutes!!! :haha:

Horatio Caine
11-08-2004, 05:14 PM
Andy Roddick's excuse (based on the fact that [i am going to get ripped for this comment!] Americans are notoriously poor spellers):

I thought I was playing Gaston Glaudio! How was i to know the guy was actually Gaston Gaudio!

User id 7816
11-08-2004, 06:46 PM
haha, that was a good one jez;)

A fan came running naked on the court, circling around Roddick for 2 mins...Thus, his 1st serve went down to 11% and he made 32 doubles during the next 2 sets which Gaston won.

maratski
11-08-2004, 06:55 PM
Marat was fatigued from the beer drinking, partying, **** the ladies :tape: ;)

Chloe le Bopper
11-09-2004, 02:23 AM
Andy Roddick's excuse (based on the fact that [i am going to get ripped for this comment!] Americans are notoriously poor spellers):

I thought I was playing Gaston Glaudio! How was i to know the guy was actually Gaston Gaudio!
I was going to make a play off that as well :p

Havok
11-09-2004, 02:34 AM
What nobody used the good 'ol excuse of "Gaudio just got lucky :ras:"

Action Jackson
11-09-2004, 04:54 AM
Gaudio beat Marat, because the Russian mafia bet huge amounts of money on Gaudio to win, that they told it would be more benefical to the career of Marat to lose this match.

Action Jackson
11-09-2004, 05:13 AM
I'm sure a convenient excuse can be found ;) :smoke:

Come on Neely, don't be shy have an attempt at an excuse that will be used. :)

MisterQ
11-09-2004, 05:19 AM
"Glod was on my side," said Glaudio.

Action Jackson
11-09-2004, 05:24 AM
"Glod was on my side," said Glaudio.

Oh Glod Q, you have struck again.

Marc Rosset is Tall
11-09-2004, 07:16 AM
Gaudio beat Marat, because the Russian mafia bet huge amounts of money on Gaudio to win, that they told it would be more benefical to the career of Marat to lose this match.


:haha: :haha:

User id 7816
11-09-2004, 07:37 AM
hooo we already have the excuses started even before the event has begun, as quoted by GO:

he take full advantage of the others being tired and or burned out

Marc Rosset is Tall
11-09-2004, 07:41 AM
Originally posted by G O
he take full advantage of the others being tired and or burned out .

This is a good one.

RonJeremy
11-09-2004, 08:19 AM
Don't worry the matches won't last until 23:00hr. Roddick will be safely battered into submission within 90 minutes and Fish 89 minutes. Maybe the Americans would prefer to get it all over with as quickly as possible - take the motorway option: Ginepri - 45 minutes!!! :haha:

:haha:

RonJeremy
11-09-2004, 08:20 AM
Gaston sabotaged the food in the players restaurant and the other seven received food poisoning and hospitalisation, which left them lacking in hydration and energy, for Gaston to take advantage.

WyveN
11-09-2004, 09:08 AM
Safin can blame the ugly looking lines people after being spoiled in Madrid.

FryslanBoppe
11-09-2004, 09:13 AM
Moya could blame excessive dandruff falling in his eyes as he is about to serve.

WyveN
11-09-2004, 09:15 AM
Federer can blame bad memories of Mattress Macs speech after winning last year.

FryslanBoppe
11-09-2004, 09:18 AM
Hewitt can blame all the media intrusions that effected his preparation, therefore stuffing up his chances.

WyveN
11-09-2004, 09:19 AM
Coria can say his still in poor form after being suspended in 2001

FryslanBoppe
11-09-2004, 09:27 AM
Roddick can blame the wind, the umpiring and the fact that they scheduled his match too early in the morning.

Horatio Caine
11-09-2004, 10:49 AM
Safin can blame the ugly looking lines people after being spoiled in Madrid.

He probably took the spoils with him. :lol:

Marat will turn up in Houston in a "Marat tour-truck" instead of a limo and all the ballgirls will just saunter out of the back. I'd love to Mac's face if that happened! :lol:

Horatio Caine
11-09-2004, 10:57 AM
Roddick can blame the wind, the umpiring and the fact that they scheduled his match too early in the morning.

I think Henman could do something similar - he hates wind, he hates slightly chubby ball-kids and he can't stand early starts (09:00 v Hewitt at Indian Wells 1/6 2/6 and 09:30- v Koubek at Davis Cup 3/6 3/6 1/6). Plus he doesn't like playing the Argentines...all in all, a good list of excuses.

He could also blame Gaudio for nicking his magnesium pills and playing Ricky Martin music loud in the room next door all night. Not to mention Gaudio's audacity to leave a few bits of clay dirt on the court which haven't been removed from his shoes since he last played...

Also, the fact that the tournament is played outdoors which gives him an 80% chance of a cold resulting in the usual comical red nose effect...the smell of burgers and hotdogs....the crowd not settling down in 60 seconds flat between change of ends...

Horatio Caine
11-09-2004, 10:20 PM
...well another excuse could be that the players are nervous. They don't want to be the first to lose a set/match to him on hardcourt because that would be unthinkable!!!! Reminds me of the days when everyone was so nervous to lose to Spadea on his whopping (:worship: Vince!) 21-match losing streak...and then that "English" pillock with the big serve comes along....!!! :)

BaselineSmash
11-09-2004, 10:53 PM
Roddick bts. Glaudio 6-3 5-7 6-2

"I felt like I was in control the whole time but man, his grunting really started to get on my nerves in the second set. I told the umpire but he didn't really take account of what I was saying. In the circumstances, I guess you could say I was glad to beat Glaudio, but that second set was purely down to grunting, man".

Horatio Caine
11-09-2004, 11:01 PM
Roddick bts. Glaudio 6-3 5-7 6-2

"I felt like I was in control the whole time but man, his grunting really started to get on my nerves in the second set. I told the umpire but he didn't really take account of what I was saying. In the circumstances, I guess you could say I was glad to beat Glaudio, but that second set was purely down to grunting, man".

:haha:

Horatio Caine
11-09-2004, 11:08 PM
Moya could blame excessive dandruff falling in his eyes as he is about to serve.

:haha: :haha: :haha: :haha:

Action Jackson
11-10-2004, 02:56 AM
Roddick bts. Glaudio 6-3 5-7 6-2

"I felt like I was in control the whole time but man, his grunting really started to get on my nerves in the second set. I told the umpire but he didn't really take account of what I was saying. In the circumstances, I guess you could say I was glad to beat Glaudio, but that second set was purely down to grunting, man".

That's very creative.

Action Jackson
11-10-2004, 02:58 AM
Federer losing to Gaudio, he was distracted by a plot from Brad Gilbert and Duckboy to kidnap Mirka and hypontise her, so she could give away Rogi's secrets, and Glaudio took advantage.

tennischick
11-10-2004, 03:03 AM
if Duckboy is wearing the Subway Shirt, they will blame that for his losing a set to Gaudio :lol:

Action Jackson
11-10-2004, 03:11 AM
Boris Yeltsin decides to walk into the stadium through the point and puts off Marat's concentration.

Lee
11-10-2004, 04:16 AM
"Glod was on my side," said Glaudio.

:rolls: Q :worship:

Lee
11-10-2004, 04:18 AM
His opponent has nervous cramp.

Captain Obvious
11-10-2004, 04:19 AM
Cramp has been declared an injury by the International Medical Committee.

G O
11-10-2004, 09:10 AM
in·ju·ry ( P ) Pronunciation Key (nj-r)
n. pl. in·ju·ries

1. Damage or harm done to or suffered by a person or thing: escaped from the accident without injury; a scandal that did considerable injury to the campaign.

2. A particular form of hurt, damage, or loss: a leg injury

[Middle English injurie, from Anglo-Norman, from Latin iniria, a wrong, injustice, from feminine of inirius, unjust : in-, not; see in-1 + is, ir-, law; see yewes- in Indo-European Roots.]



I still can't figure it out :scratch:

YulBrynnerWasBald
11-10-2004, 09:20 AM
Hewitt forgot to use his c'mon chants.

I♥PsY@Mus!c
11-10-2004, 10:50 AM
Funny topic and those excuses also. :haha:

Marc Rosset is Tall
11-10-2004, 10:55 AM
The whole field got paid more money to lose than they would get for winning TMC.

Sjengster
11-10-2004, 11:11 AM
What the Players Said:

Federer: "Obviously I wasn't at 100%, you know, otherwise I don't think I would have struggled out there too much. The match from my side was good early on, but he's a deceptive player, he comes back at you. Yeah, it's a surprise to me also, to be losing to him on this surface."

Roddick: "Credit to him, he came up with some great shots there at the end, but that call I got early in the second was just ridiculous. I was on top of him, rolling him, and then Lars gets involved when he shouldn't. I mean, I don't know whether Gaston had slipped him a few bills beforehand... yeah, yeah, I'm joking. No, it's a disappointing note to end the year on, but I can take a lot away that I improved as well."

Hewitt: "Yeah, obviously everyone knows he's a great player on a clay court with great results, but... well, I think the wind helped him a bit today, you know. Tough for me to control my shots, and he hits with all that spin, you know, the ball's pretty much, you know, staying in no matter what. Next match, I think he'll go, to be honest with you mate."

Moya: "I play him a few times before, all in Spain, and were tough matches - he won me in Barcelona twice, I beat him in Davis Cup and in Madrid. But I still have some pain in my shoulder, I was not serving too hard and is tough to beat him entirely from baseline, his backhand is very solid. Hopefully I can train good in Spain, prepare for the final and forget this match quickly."

Coria: "It was my dream to participate in and win this tournament, but that must wait for another time now. Gaston played very good, very solid, but I was not at the physical level required to play these matches. I hope very much that I can recover and reach my normal level, and then perhaps revenge will not be too much of a difficulty."

Safin: "What, you - you think is surprise that he won this match? Where have you been, huh? When I come straight from indoor season and have, like, a week to prepare for these courts, these conditions - is just terrible, terrible scheduling. Gaston, he's not winning too many matches indoors, he's got a lot in reserve, you know. Sure, he played well. But the ATP, you need to ask them why they have this ridiculous schedule."

Henman: "Yeah definitely, I think it's inevitable, you know, with the nature of the conditions and the strengths of my game that I was, you know, the favourite on paper, and yes as you say I have a good record against him, but that doesn't always, you know, translate to the match court. Credit to him, I thought he returned and passed much better than I was expecting on a surface like this. I've always maintained that if I, you know, play to my strengths and stay aggressive then I'll win, but I was lacking a bit of sharpness today on my volleys. I've been feeling below par for a few weeks now and yeah, you know, he probably took advantage of that."

Gaudio: "It was an amazing feeling, I did not think I could do it at the start of the tournament. But when I was standing there with the trophy, the tournament directors applauding me on the court, I thought to myself, 'I must be the worst champion in the history of the YEC.'"

Sjengster
11-10-2004, 11:18 AM
TMC RR
G. Gaudio def. R. Federer 3-6, 7-5, 6-3
G. Gaudio def. G. Coria 6-4, 6-1
G. Gaudio def. L. Hewitt 7-6, 6-4/C. Moya 6-2, 6-3

SF
G. Gaudio def. A. Roddick 1-6, 6-3, 6-4

F
G. Gaudio def. M. Safin 5-7, 6-2, 6-4, 7-6/T. Henman 6-3, 4-6, 7-6, 6-4

Horatio Caine
11-10-2004, 11:24 AM
Sjengster! :haha: :haha: :haha:

I :worship: that post! The best! :worship:

You can actually picture the players saying that - the language and everything is perfect!! I fell off my chair reading Safin, Henman and Gaudio!! :haha: :haha:

sigmagirl91
11-10-2004, 11:26 AM
I LMAO at Safin. That would be something he'd say, definitely.

Marc Rosset is Tall
11-10-2004, 11:29 AM
The best ones so far Sjengster.

TennisLurker
11-10-2004, 11:29 AM
That was terrific, brilliant

Marc Rosset is Tall
11-10-2004, 11:35 AM
Sjengster even nailed the right amount of you knows in the interviews.

Sjengster
11-10-2004, 11:44 AM
I think it's a testament to how predictable ATP interviews have become that you can capture the style of the top players so easily. If Agassi and Nalbandian get in as alternates or replacements, they wouldn't be too hard either...

Marc Rosset is Tall
11-10-2004, 11:46 AM
I think it's a testament to how predictable ATP interviews have become that you can capture the style of the top players so easily. If Agassi and Nalbandian get in as alternates or replacements, they wouldn't be too hard either...

True, but Canas will be the alternate actually.

Sjengster
11-10-2004, 11:49 AM
Hewitt and Henman are masters of the 'you knows'. Moya has the slightly broken Spanglish. Coria's translated statements are incredibly precise and stilted. Roddick will try too hard to throw a few quips into his breezy style. Safin will rail against the world if given the chance. Federer has a rather bland, formal style of speech with occasional moments of indiscretion. And Gaudio has... an interesting attitude.

Horatio Caine
11-10-2004, 11:50 AM
True, but Canas will be the alternate actually.

Huh? Isn't David N first alternate then Canas second?

TennisLurker
11-10-2004, 11:52 AM
david said he wont go to houston as an alternate

Marc Rosset is Tall
11-10-2004, 11:52 AM
Very precise and true summary of the media personas that the top 8 have.

Marc Rosset is Tall
11-10-2004, 11:53 AM
Huh? Isn't David N first alternate then Canas second?

Nalbandian isn't going to Houston, so that's why Canas is the alternate.

WyveN
11-10-2004, 11:54 AM
Gaudio: But when I was standing there with the trophy, the tournament directors applauding me on the court

Brilliant Sjeng. Very realistic up until that sentence.

Horatio Caine
11-10-2004, 11:54 AM
Oh yeah! So if Willy is first alternate - who is 2nd? Isn't Joachim injured?

Maybe it is time for Hrbaty to pull out of Bratislava!

Horatio Caine
11-10-2004, 11:55 AM
Sjengster - how would Canas speak? :)

Sjengster
11-10-2004, 11:57 AM
Brilliant Sjeng. Very realistic up until that sentence.

All right, substitute "tournament sponsors" for "tournament directors". :p Because they will applaud mindlessly no matter who's won. ;)

Sjengster
11-10-2004, 12:00 PM
Sjengster - how would Canas speak? :)

Umm... I've only seen a couple of brief interviews and he's quite softly spoken, though he shares the same kind of "Spanglish" style that Moya has, lots of the "I'm happy to be doing well in this tournament", "Will be tough match tomorrow", etc etc.

I saw him in a little clip on the ATP Tennis show a few weeks ago when they had a feature called Hit Me With Your Best Shot, which had some players being interviewed about their favourite shot. They got him and Gaudio to say the slogan to camera -. Gaudio got it right first time, but they then showed all the dozen takes of Canas trying to enunciate the words properly with his heavy dialect, stumbling over them and mocking himself. It endeared him to me more than in the past...

Action Jackson
11-10-2004, 12:10 PM
Umm... I've only seen a couple of brief interviews and he's quite softly spoken, though he shares the same kind of "Spanglish" style that Moya has, lots of the "I'm happy to be doing well in this tournament", "Will be tough match tomorrow", etc etc.

I saw him in a little clip on the ATP Tennis show a few weeks ago when they had a feature called Hit Me With Your Best Shot, which had some players being interviewed about their favourite shot. They got him and Gaudio to say the slogan to camera -. Gaudio got it right first time, but they then showed all the dozen takes of Canas trying to enunciate the words properly with his heavy dialect, stumbling over them and mocking himself. It endeared him to me more than in the past...

Canas's English isn't too bad, though he probably doesn't speak it as well as some of the other South Americans like Gaudio, Gonzalez or Massu, but he is better than Coria or Chela.

Tarango wrote some good words about him.

tennischick
11-10-2004, 12:11 PM
Coria speaks that well? i had no idea (honestly).

Sjengster
11-10-2004, 12:15 PM
TC - coming through a translator it's inevitably going to sound a bit more formal. And more to the point, Coria has a policy of being extremely guarded with the media ever since the suspension in 2001, rarely does he let out anything that he thinks will cast suspicion on him.

Action Jackson
11-10-2004, 12:16 PM
Coria speaks that well? i had no idea (honestly).

He can speak it a bit, but just prefers to use translators so the likelihood of him getting misquouted is less.

These excuses are getting better. I am waiting for the time if Gaudio wins a set.

*Ljubica*
11-10-2004, 12:16 PM
Congrats Sjengster for your hilarious "quotes" post :p

Vale
11-10-2004, 04:47 PM
Sjenster, you're amazing!!

PRESS COMMENTARY:
No longer gloomy, Glaudio the Gladiator glided his glorious backhand across the net and gloated. A glut of glamour!

Action Jackson
11-11-2004, 12:55 AM
Gaudio had an easy draw.

hitchhiker
11-11-2004, 01:02 AM
i make 3 seperate bet

bet #1 - Gaudio not win a set against anyone
bet #2 - Gaudio lose all matcheas
bet #3 - gaudio not win a set versus hewitt and federer

if all 3 right i am rich, if only 2 then still profit

Fedex
11-11-2004, 01:07 AM
Ah, its good to see hitchhiker is once again making his intellectual contributions to MTF.

Action Jackson
11-11-2004, 01:09 AM
I see you haven't been getting any lifts lately hitchhiker.

sigmagirl91
11-11-2004, 01:20 AM
i make 3 seperate bet

bet #1 - Gaudio not win a set against anyone
bet #2 - Gaudio lose all matcheas
bet #3 - gaudio not win a set versus hewitt and federer

if all 3 right i am rich, if only 2 then still profit

And this is supposed to be a "brilliant" contribution to MTF? OK....

MisterQ
11-11-2004, 01:21 AM
Mattress Mac is blatantly cheering on the South Americans.

Action Jackson
11-11-2004, 01:21 AM
Thank you Q another brilliant contribution.

Mattress Mac wouldn't he be known as Jaime McGinvale then?

sigmagirl91
11-11-2004, 01:27 AM
Ah, its good to see hitchhiker is once again making his intellectual contributions to MTF.

I always look forward to reading it's incredi-bullshit.

buddyholly
11-11-2004, 01:37 AM
HEWITT: Well yeah, y'know my nail polish wasn't completely dry in that first set and I was too careful changing my grip, but once it was dry it was better and I was able to win in three. It's a new colour, d'ye like it mate?

Action Jackson
11-11-2004, 01:39 AM
Good to see there are plenty of good contributions here.

Fedex
11-11-2004, 02:23 AM
I maybe the only one who believes, but I belive Gaudio can, not will, but can win a match, maybe even two. He has played well against Hewitt in the past, and I believe he can beat him. Moya is a tough one to answer. I haven't seen Moya play in awhile, so I have no idea on his form. If Moya is off his game, I dont see Gaudio being in the semifinals impossible. As long as he beats Hewitt, I will be happy.

Billabong
11-11-2004, 02:25 AM
Good luck Gaston:yeah:!

Zetlandsk
11-12-2004, 05:44 AM
Gaston sabotaged the food in the players restaurant and the other seven received food poisoning and hospitalisation, which left them lacking in hydration and energy, for Gaston to take advantage.

:haha:

Zetlandsk
11-12-2004, 05:45 AM
What the Players Said:

Federer: "Obviously I wasn't at 100%, you know, otherwise I don't think I would have struggled out there too much. The match from my side was good early on, but he's a deceptive player, he comes back at you. Yeah, it's a surprise to me also, to be losing to him on this surface."

Roddick: "Credit to him, he came up with some great shots there at the end, but that call I got early in the second was just ridiculous. I was on top of him, rolling him, and then Lars gets involved when he shouldn't. I mean, I don't know whether Gaston had slipped him a few bills beforehand... yeah, yeah, I'm joking. No, it's a disappointing note to end the year on, but I can take a lot away that I improved as well."

Hewitt: "Yeah, obviously everyone knows he's a great player on a clay court with great results, but... well, I think the wind helped him a bit today, you know. Tough for me to control my shots, and he hits with all that spin, you know, the ball's pretty much, you know, staying in no matter what. Next match, I think he'll go, to be honest with you mate."

Moya: "I play him a few times before, all in Spain, and were tough matches - he won me in Barcelona twice, I beat him in Davis Cup and in Madrid. But I still have some pain in my shoulder, I was not serving too hard and is tough to beat him entirely from baseline, his backhand is very solid. Hopefully I can train good in Spain, prepare for the final and forget this match quickly."

Coria: "It was my dream to participate in and win this tournament, but that must wait for another time now. Gaston played very good, very solid, but I was not at the physical level required to play these matches. I hope very much that I can recover and reach my normal level, and then perhaps revenge will not be too much of a difficulty."

Safin: "What, you - you think is surprise that he won this match? Where have you been, huh? When I come straight from indoor season and have, like, a week to prepare for these courts, these conditions - is just terrible, terrible scheduling. Gaston, he's not winning too many matches indoors, he's got a lot in reserve, you know. Sure, he played well. But the ATP, you need to ask them why they have this ridiculous schedule."

Henman: "Yeah definitely, I think it's inevitable, you know, with the nature of the conditions and the strengths of my game that I was, you know, the favourite on paper, and yes as you say I have a good record against him, but that doesn't always, you know, translate to the match court. Credit to him, I thought he returned and passed much better than I was expecting on a surface like this. I've always maintained that if I, you know, play to my strengths and stay aggressive then I'll win, but I was lacking a bit of sharpness today on my volleys. I've been feeling below par for a few weeks now and yeah, you know, he probably took advantage of that."

Gaudio: "It was an amazing feeling, I did not think I could do it at the start of the tournament. But when I was standing there with the trophy, the tournament directors applauding me on the court, I thought to myself, 'I must be the worst champion in the history of the YEC.'"


:worship: :worship:

Peoples
11-12-2004, 07:14 PM
Don't forget about Roddick's injuries and bad haircut. I'm not sure how the latter would work it's way into a loss, but we'll find a way!
:haha: You're right, it's terrible.

Horatio Caine
11-13-2004, 10:32 PM
i make 3 seperate bet

bet #1 - Gaudio not win a set against anyone
bet #2 - Gaudio lose all matcheas
bet #3 - gaudio not win a set versus hewitt and federer

if all 3 right i am rich, if only 2 then still profit

Ok - but you see mate, the first bet cancels out the other 2 - or didn't you realise that? See, if Gaudio doesn't win a set then he therefore cannot win a match against any player. Hope that clears up your lack of understanding.

buddyholly
11-13-2004, 10:54 PM
Ok - but you see mate, the first bet cancels out the other 2 - or didn't you realise that? See, if Gaudio doesn't win a set then he therefore cannot win a match against any player. Hope that clears up your lack of understanding.

I see no problem with his understanding of his bets. He said he made three SEPARATE bets. If all three are correct he wins. If Gaudio wins a set against someone other than Hewitt or Federer, he wins on only two of the bets, as hitchhiker said.

Horatio Caine
11-13-2004, 10:56 PM
Ok - my mistake. But still, it is hardly relevant in this thread.

buddyholly
11-13-2004, 10:58 PM
Then why bring it up?

hitchhiker
11-14-2004, 12:34 AM
thank you buddy holly.

Fedex
11-14-2004, 01:10 AM
Those qoutes are great, Sjengster :)

buddyholly
11-14-2004, 03:14 AM
thank you buddy holly.
Hope you get rich.

User id 7816
11-14-2004, 10:39 AM
Remember Fed has a new haircut....it can be a major reason.

FryslanBoppe
11-14-2004, 10:40 AM
The aerodynamics of the wind effected Roger's hair and therefore infiltrated into his nervous system and fried his brain and when he realised what happened the match was over.

joeb_uk
11-14-2004, 10:47 AM
Ok - but you see mate, the first bet cancels out the other 2 - or didn't you realise that? See, if Gaudio doesn't win a set then he therefore cannot win a match against any player. Hope that clears up your lack of understanding.
he doesnt quite understand that, but it was nice of you to tell him jez!

Boludo
11-14-2004, 02:39 PM
The aerodynamics of the wind effected Roger's hair and therefore infiltrated into his nervous system and fried his brain and when he realised what happened the match was over.

:)

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 09:21 AM
this thread should be changed to
"Best excuses if Gaudio fails to win a set or a match in Houston"

1) his blue socks annoyed his opponents so much that they played better then ever before just to beat him as fast as possible

WyveN
11-18-2004, 09:37 AM
I didn't realise Hewitt had already won his match against Gaudio 6-0 6-0, perhaps in the hitchhiker world?

Mrs. B
11-18-2004, 10:13 AM
Those qoutes are great, Sjengster :)

indeed, and Q's was too funny! :lol:

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 10:17 AM
I didn't realise Hewitt had already won his match against Gaudio 6-0 6-0, perhaps in the hitchhiker world?

What a world it is.

federer_roar
11-18-2004, 10:56 AM
Isn't this topic to be discussed after Gaudio at least win one match in Houston?

It's like worrying about outside marriage affair without even getting married first. :rolleyes:

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 10:57 AM
no excuses needed...this thread should be dead after federer finishes gaudio off tomorrow

cheers

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 11:00 AM
sorry that should be when hewitt finshes him off not federer ;)

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:07 AM
Isn't this topic to be discussed after Gaudio at least win one match in Houston?

It's like worrying about outside marriage affair without even getting married first. :rolleyes:

Comprehension not your strong point it clearly says a set or a match, that does not mean he has to win a match. :)

gambler, there is a chance that he might not play this match.

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 11:11 AM
really?? is he injured?

federer_roar
11-18-2004, 11:11 AM
Comprehension not your strong point it clearly says a set or a match, that does not mean he has to win a match. :)

gambler, there is a chance that he might not play this match.

Well, do you mean winning a set from Hewitt in Houston will still be considered quite a accomplisment? :mad:

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:19 AM
really?? is he injured?

He had a problem within the groin area and both Gaudio and Moya were slipping around at the end of the match and it wouldn't surprise me if it was strained, though fortunately for him he doesn't play tomorrow. It's not a definite, but he might not play.

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:20 AM
Well, do you mean winning a set from Hewitt in Houston will still be considered quite a accomplisment? :mad:

Top of the class you are so brilliant, words can't describe you. Try reading the start of the thread and you might get it.

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 11:21 AM
well he has a couple of days to rest up - i think hewitt v gaudio is in a couple of days, for some odd reason federer is playing tomorrow v moya

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:23 AM
bg, it's just the way the schedule is and they can't give Andy all night matches.

federer_roar
11-18-2004, 11:24 AM
The match against Hewitt will be Gaudio's last show in Houston. Too bad if can't play.

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 11:27 AM
poor hewitt. everyone got to beat up on the clay courter and hewitt gets canas, not very good but at least can win titles on this surface.

Here are some more reasons.

Gaudio failed to win a set in houston because he was so frustrated on fast surface that he smashed all his rackets during practice and had to use squash rackets.

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 11:29 AM
hitchhiker which player do u support just out of curiosity?

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:30 AM
hitchhiker which player do u support just out of curiosity?

He is a Roddick man, and this was the guy who provided the highlight of Wimbledon with his humour and prematch boasting about Andy wiping the floor with Federer in the final.

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:31 AM
Funny, that our resident comedian thinks the surface was fast, in fact it's one of the slowest harrdcourts that they played on and that's common knowledge.

Houston is not the US Open hh.

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 11:33 AM
and roddick was close to doing it, very close to winning wimbledon.

i know i looked like a fool with my prediction and right now looks like roddick has no chance against federer but we are in round 1 of 12 round bout and mark my words Roddick will win many more slams and be very competetive with federer. He might even beat him this week but i think roddick has his mind on the davis cup tacco in es panalo.

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 11:33 AM
He is a Roddick man, and this was the guy who provided the highlight of Wimbledon with his humour and prematch boasting about Andy wiping the floor with Federer in the final.

yeah i figured as much - well when federer "beats up on" roddick for the upteenth time later this week maybe then he will crawl back under his rock

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:34 AM
yeah i figured as much - well when federer "beats up on" roddick for the upteenth time later this week maybe then he will crawl back under his rock

Just do a search and you can find some of the pearls he came out with. Seriously it was the one of the few things that made Wimbledon interesting and hh gets full credit for that.

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 11:35 AM
Funny, that our resident comedian thinks the surface was fast, in fact it's one of the slowest harrdcourts that they played on and that's common knowledge.


its not fast for normal players but for my favorite clay court donkey this feels like disney on ice.

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:37 AM
its not fast for normal players but for my favorite clay court donkey this feels like disney on ice.

He hasn't complained about the surface, and actually none of the players have. No slope or the speed of the court there haven't been complaints.

Are you serious about Roddick winning more Slams than Federer at the end of their careers?

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 11:37 AM
Just do a search and you can find some of the pearls he came out with. Seriously it was the one of the few things that made Wimbledon interesting and hh gets full credit for that.

i will have last laugh in davis cup final. plenty more wimbledons but only one spain v usa davis cup final in spain.

bad gambler, roddick very likely to win this week but may be focused on the big kahuna, davis cup and then i dive into kitchen and begin baking pies.

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 11:38 AM
and roddick was close to doing it, very close to winning wimbledon.

i know i looked like a fool with my prediction and right now looks like roddick has no chance against federer but we are in round 1 of 12 round bout and mark my words Roddick will win many more slams and be very competetive with federer. He might even beat him this week but i think roddick has his mind on the davis cup tacco in es panalo.


to win many more slams he's going to have to win french open coz its just a mismatch on the other surfaces

until roddick learns there's more to tennis than serving, you may be right - which begs the question, can he volley?

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 11:39 AM
Are you serious about Roddick winning more Slams than Federer at the end of their careers?


i hope that's not what he meant - if so that would do it for me for the night

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 11:39 AM
He hasn't complained about the surface, and actually none of the players have. No slope or the speed of the court there haven't been complaints.


the americans have done it again with superb technology court. USA USA USA


Are you serious about Roddick winning more Slams than Federer at the end of their careers?

absolutely. I see storm on horizon.

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 11:41 AM
until roddick learns there's more to tennis than serving, you may be right - which begs the question, can he volley?

someone didnt watch henman v roddick.
compare roddick year ago to now and year ago he went on rip of hardcourt season. think what he can do when he reaches his potential.

sparkus8
11-18-2004, 11:43 AM
Yeh we saw Henman volley alot!!:)

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 11:44 AM
absolutely. I see storm on horizon.


mate i commend you for you standing up for your player - that's what true patriotism is all about. i'm like that with respect to hewitt. but then i can see that hewitt doesn't even deserve to lick the boots of federer, he is just from another planet.

once you start making such outlandish comments, patriotism turns into blind faith and stupidity

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 11:44 AM
Gaudio didnt win set at Houston because he was scared of meeting roddick in semi finals.

Gaudio didnt win set at Houston because he didnt want to get noticed.

Gaudio didnt win set at Houston because his scared of getting higher seeding in first round and then getting thrashed.

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 11:45 AM
someone didnt watch henman v roddick.
compare roddick year ago to now and year ago he went on rip of hardcourt season. think what he can do when he reaches his potential.


so why doesn't someone have a word in his ear and explain to him the concept of serve volleying?

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:46 AM
the americans have done it again with superb technology court. USA USA USA

This is almost as good as your old stuff, but if they were that good, they would have got that right the first time.

absolutely. I see storm on horizon.

I thought you would have had enough dose of humble pie, the only way the US can win is if they get the court surface changed.

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 11:46 AM
once you start making such outlandish comments, patriotism turns into blind faith and stupidity

You just ordered a pie for when roddick wins houston this week ;)
You can put my faith to blind patriotism if you want but mark my words, i will have last laugh.

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:47 AM
Gaudio didnt win set at Houston because he was scared of meeting roddick in semi finals.

Gaudio didnt win set at Houston because he didnt want to get noticed.

Gaudio didnt win set at Houston because his scared of getting higher seeding in first round and then getting thrashed.

Grand delusions at best, then again there could be the very difficult scenario that Federer and Moya happen to be better players.

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:48 AM
i hope that's not what he meant - if so that would do it for me for the night

No, he seems to be serious, though there could be a lot of tongue in cheek with these comments.

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 11:48 AM
so why doesn't someone have a word in his ear and explain to him the concept of serve volleying?

watch roddick-safin or better yet look at statistics about who goes to net more after match.

sparkus8
11-18-2004, 11:50 AM
The only way Roddick will ever win a grand slam tournament is if he pulls a Tonya Harding on Federer!!

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 11:51 AM
No, he seems to be serious, though there could be a lot of tongue in cheek with these comments.

there was nothing tongue in cheek about wimbledon predictions that were very close or davis cup predictions or houston predictions.

gaudio losing every set predictions were not tongue in cheek either.

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 11:51 AM
LOL as we speak roddick has ordered a couple of hitman from new york's finest

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 11:51 AM
The only way Roddick will ever win a grand slam tournament is if he pulls a Tonya Harding on Federer!!

give me address i will send you tennis books so you can learn ;)

WyveN
11-18-2004, 11:54 AM
give me address i will send you tennis books so you can learn ;)

Judging by your comments it sounds like the movie "Wimbledon" is your source of tennis knowledge.

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:55 AM
there was nothing tongue in cheek about wimbledon predictions that were very close or davis cup predictions or houston predictions.

gaudio losing every set predictions were not tongue in cheek either.

What happened at Wimbledon? Roddick had more than enough chances, but failed to deliver, just like your outlandish claims they failed to deliver so far and the Gaudio one doesn't count as it was not outlandish or even bordering on radical.

Wow! that was radical betting on Gaudio not to win a set. I mean that's a real brave bet.

Saying the US will win the DC is a radical call.

bad gambler
11-18-2004, 11:56 AM
Judging by your comments it sounds like the movie "Wimbledon" is your source of tennis knowledge.


oh wyven why did you spoil it for hitch? all this time he thought that kirsten dunst was a top 10 player on the WTA ;)

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 11:59 AM
oh wyven why did you spoil it for hitch? all this time he thought that kirsten dunst was a top 10 player on the WTA ;)

The resident comedian, aww come on he needs us to practice his lines. :)

sparkus8
11-18-2004, 12:01 PM
give me address i will send you tennis books so you can learn ;)

Mate if you have tennis books that have the results of future grand slams I would be more than happy to take them.

You should just be happy that Roddick has one Major to his name because as long as Federer is around no-one else is going to get a look in unless you can play on the dirt!!

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 12:05 PM
Roddick is not winning on the dirt especially at Slam level, he has as much chance as Gaudio becoming the Wimbledon champ.

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 12:07 PM
.
You should just be happy that Roddick has one Major to his name because as long as Federer is around no-one else is going to get a look in unless you can play on the dirt!!

lets assume federer plays until 31. thats another 8 years.

you are saying federer will win 3 slams per year until then? thats 24 slams plus 4 he already has.

thats 28 slams :haha:, twice as much as sampras.

the only good thing the english can make movie about is tea and toffees, not tennis.

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 12:09 PM
Roddick is not winning on the dirt especially at Slam level, he has as much chance as Gaudio becoming the Wimbledon champ.

please dont compare clay court donkeys to people who can actually win tournaments on the red stuff.

i never said usa will win dc but roddick will put in a performance that will make spain cheer for us and chant USA USA USA

like rocky v drago.

sparkus8
11-18-2004, 12:14 PM
lets assume federer plays until 31. thats another 8 years.

you are saying federer will win 3 slams per year until then? thats 24 slams plus 4 he already has.

thats 28 slams :haha:, twice as much as sampras.

the only good thing the english can make movie about is tea and toffees, not tennis.

Of I'm not saying Federer will win that many. I'm saying Roddick will be lucky to win many more, if any!

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 12:17 PM
please dont compare clay court donkeys to people who can actually win tournaments on the red stuff.

i never said usa will win dc but roddick will put in a performance that will make spain cheer for us and chant USA USA USA

like rocky v drago.

We have had this discussion about Roddick on clay and even you have said it yourself that it's about time he stepped up and had some big wins, but he honestly has much chance of winning RG as Gaudio does of Wimbledon.

I am sorry Houston and St Pölten are very small titles and how many big claycourt players play in these events?

Stop deluding yourself that the Spanish are going to be doing anything but booing Roddick.

Shy
11-18-2004, 12:19 PM
Even if Andy manage to get one single win in D.C. Does hitchhiker really think that Fish is going to win a match on clay against those spaniard?

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 12:24 PM
Even if Andy manage to get one single win in D.C. Does hitchhiker really think that Fish is going to win a match on clay against those spaniard?

He thinks Andy should be allowed to be the # 1 and the # 2 player in the singles, he is just having a laugh at our expense.

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 12:26 PM
We have had this discussion about Roddick on clay and even you have said it yourself that it's about time he stepped up and had some big wins


yet you seem to pop champagne over fact that gaudio is able to beat schalken and novak in auckland



but he honestly has much chance of winning RG as Gaudio does of Wimbledon.


then why is roddick 18 to 1 to win French open while Gaudio is 165 to 1 to win Wimbledon

by the way shy i never rated fish and he is likely to cost usa the cup because our best player isnt going to compete by choice

hitchhiker
11-18-2004, 12:27 PM
he is just having a laugh at our expense.

that will be when i use the fire extinguisher to put out the fire of shame on everyone about writing off roddick

Kristen
11-18-2004, 12:33 PM
Sometimes I just wish there was an 'ignore' option for certain threads :lol:
This isn't available, right?!? ;)

buddyholly
11-18-2004, 12:34 PM
Stop deluding yourself that the Spanish are going to be doing anything but booing Roddick.

Is Roddick black?

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 12:34 PM
yet you seem to pop champagne over fact that gaudio is able to beat schalken and novak in auckland

How little you know. I don't drink for a start and I take it for what it's worth , and this has been already been discussed about the relative merits of these particular wins in respect to the surfaces, but I remember someone trying to turn this particular point around, but forgot that has Roddick defeated 2 GS champs or 4 finalists on clay as Gaudio has done on a hardcourt.

then why is roddick 18 to 1 to win French open while Gaudio is 165 to 1 to win Wimbledon

Not the point and someone who is in the top 3 of the world being 18-1 is not exactly a great endorsement of their ability. 165-1 is too short for starters.

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 12:35 PM
Is Roddick black?

:)

Action Jackson
11-18-2004, 12:36 PM
that will be when i use the fire extinguisher to put out the fire of shame on everyone about writing off roddick

Just like when you stuck around after Wimbledon. You left here quicker than an Olympic weightlifter running away from a drug test.

WyveN
11-18-2004, 12:48 PM
Just like when you stuck around after Wimbledon. You left here quicker than an Olympic weightlifter running away from a drug test.

:haha: :haha: :haha: