Andy tripped along stupidly. He was on his way to meet his lover, David Nalbandian, for Valentine's Day. He smiled to see a ducky hopping along, carrying a toy in its mouth.
Andy was almost in fat-ass island when he came across a hairy cake, lying alone on a fat plate. "That must be a treat from my hot bear," he said to himself, and tripped over to it. The cake looked sexy, so he ate it.
It gave him the most big tingling sensation in his tummy. "How unusual!" he said and continued tripping to see David Nalbandian.
When David Nalbandian came out to meet him, he took one look and fell over.
"What is it?" Andy cried pleasingly.
"Your butt! And your head!" David Nalbandian said. "They're hot! Can't you feel it?"
Andy felt his butt and his head. They were indeed quite hot. "Oh, no!" Andy said. "I'm a woman!" He, or rather, she started to cry. "It must have been that hairy cake you left for me. Did you know what it would do?"
"I didn't leave you any cake," David Nalbandian said. "I got you a duck. It must have been that sweaty man who lives nearby. He acts a little smoothly, ever since he pounced a tree."
"But how can you ever love me, now that I'm a woman?" Andy sobbed.
"Well, I never knew how to tell you this," David Nalbandian said manly, "but I actually prefer women. And I think your butt is really sexy like that."
"Really?" Andy dried her tears. Andy kissed David Nalbandian and it was an entirely doughboy sensation, and they fell in love like two monkeys.....without the cheating.
They spent the night having entirely doughboy sex, until the cake wore off suddenly.
Everything was rather awkward after that.