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Thread: Laws of MTF
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post #126 of (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 06:01 PM
country flag vogus
Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 696
Re: Laws of MTF

Originally Posted by Blaze-2004
After looking through MTF since the beginning of the year, i've noticed some trends. Feel free to criticize, flame, and degrade the theories

1. Making sense is optional

2. The probably of a thread on MTF becoming about Roger Federer or Rafael Nadal or both approaches 1 with respect to time (Mandoura’s Law)

3. Speculation can be treated as fact, as can fact be considered speculation

4. Injuries are always faked, especially if the sufferer is Roddick or Hewitt (Deb's Law)

5. Supporting PHM can cause serious damages to your health (Julie's Law)

6. Everyone loves Safin. There are 2 groups of people, Rafa fans and Fed fans, and they don’t like each other too much. And everyone hates (or, at least dislikes) Roddick (Jenanun's Law)

7. (Insert noun here) is on the juice

8. Choke=Lose

9. Everyone loves BYE

10. Tennis coverage in the USA is a joke, and the commentators are all tools.

11. You do not talk about the WTA in a positive light

12. Just because a thread begins as “A” topic, doesn’t mean it cant translate to “B”, “C”, and “D” topic

13. Safin= Top 10 killa, Whole ATP Tour= Donald Young Killa, Fed= Whole ATP killa, Rafa= Fedkilla, = Rafa killa

14. If you make a post, expect to be criticized, flamed, and degraded by someone else by use of personal insults. Also, threads based on a quote from an idiot tennis figure head MUST be flamed to no end.

15. EVERYTHING gets blown out of proportion

16. Jerry Seinfeld and Chloe never lose an argument (Jerry's Law)

17. Horrible spelling, grammar misuse, and other butcherings of the English language are mandatory

18. Double standards, stereotypes, and generalizations are a must.

19. Signatures must contain either a quirky tid bit of wisdom or a laundry list of the players you support. Quotes from random movies, TV shows, or other posters are a plus. Of course 10,000 smilies are firmly required, as is a cheap shot to one or more posters.

20. MTF is a perpetual cyclone of the exact same ideas and thoughts and can be discussed ad nauseum and yet no one gets bored or leaves

21. Infamous posters change their usernames as often Puff Daddy does his, if not more so

22. Tennis is rigged. It's even more fake than professional wrestling.(GeorgeWHitler's law).

23. Useless threads, random stupdity, and smily overuse is mandatory

24. Good ways to earn vcash are creating threads that are either a quote from a person calling someone else out, a thread meant for bashing someone, threads proclaiming yourself to be the next federer when in fact, you eat bagels all day, or, more specifically, a thread that calls out Federer's dominance; each of these will elicit tons of posters from both sides of the issue, with flamewars, namecalling, and hilarity to ensue, while the thread creator swims in vriches

25. Anyone supporting a tennis player should be assumed to have some kind of sexual infatuation with said player, even if they don't recognize it themselves. (Joe's Law)

26. All player's fans are called -tards. Fedtards, Rafatards, Safintards, Djokotards, etc. These radical groups of people always believe their player to be superior and any player that beat him is a joke, on the juice, cheating, ugly, fat, a fluke, and will never beat him again. Also, stupidity and bias are prevelent in their posts and signatures.

27. The number of supporters of a given player increases proportionally with the players' rate of success but the number of haters increases exponentially with the player's rate of success. Also, if a relatively low-ranked and little known player upsets [insert top-ranked player here], that player's bandwagon fills with haters of [insert top-ranked player here]

28. The bigger the 'i'm leaving' announcement is, the less likely that a user will actually leave MTF. People who do leave here never give notice, they just disappear. (Tall One's Law)

Did I miss any?

you could condense it into a single law: MTF is a cesspool of stupidity filled with people of average and below-average intelligence.
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