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post #1 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 06:56 PM Thread Starter
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Talking Adam's joke-a-day thread!!!

Bill invites some friends round for a party, when all of a sudden a little man about a foot tall walks into the room, hops onto the piano stool and starts playing the piano absolutely beautifully. His friend Joe says, "wow that guy is amazing, where on earth did you find him?". Bill responds, "well I found this magic lamp with a genie inside, and he granted me one wish". "thats great, can I use it?" asks Joe. Bill agrees and hands him the lamp. Joe rubs it, and sure enough out pops a genie who offers him one wish. "I want a million bucks" says Joe. Suddenly the room is entirely filled with quacking ducks. Joe exclaims, "hey, I asked for a million BUCKS! not DUCKS! Bill explains, "yes, he's a bit deaf isn't he? You don't really think I asked for a 12 inch pianist do you?"

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post #2 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 06:56 PM
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

I"m awful with long jokes. I always read the end first.

I lack direction.

Chocking makes me sad.
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post #3 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 06:57 PM
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

Adam - do you need vcash?

The great thing about democracy is that it gives every voter a chance to do something stupid.
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post #4 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 06:57 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chloe le Bopper
I"m awful with long jokes. I always read the end first.
I'll try and keep them shorter in future, just for you
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post #5 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 06:58 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

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Originally Posted by cobalt60
Adam - do you need vcash?
You don't get v-cash for non-tennis apparently. I'm just eager to spread my humour
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post #6 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 07:00 PM
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

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Originally Posted by cobalt60
Adam - do you need vcash?


Can this count as Tuesday's joke?

Best twitter posts of the epic match:

@dougrobson - Whoever is supplying Mahut with hair gel needs to ink a sponsorship deal now.

@Wimbledon - FYI, with @Wimbledon live scoring devices, please add 50 to the games in the fifth set of the Isner v Mahut match.

@HolterMedia - Nice to see that a three-day test has come to tennis here @wimbledon.



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post #7 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 07:00 PM
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

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Originally Posted by adee-gee
You don't get v-cash for non-tennis apparently. I'm just eager to spread my humour
I never bother to learn the rules and I never read the instructions.

The great thing about democracy is that it gives every voter a chance to do something stupid.
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post #8 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 07:01 PM
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

I didn't know that non-tennis threads don't get vCash either. Good to know that there is some sense in the system.

(I love you like a bratty little brother Adam )

Best twitter posts of the epic match:

@dougrobson - Whoever is supplying Mahut with hair gel needs to ink a sponsorship deal now.

@Wimbledon - FYI, with @Wimbledon live scoring devices, please add 50 to the games in the fifth set of the Isner v Mahut match.

@HolterMedia - Nice to see that a three-day test has come to tennis here @wimbledon.



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post #9 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 07:02 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

Has anyone actually read the joke yet
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post #10 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 07:05 PM
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

Quote:
Originally Posted by adee-gee
Has anyone actually read the joke yet
Well, I did read the punchline

I lack direction.

Chocking makes me sad.
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post #11 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 07:05 PM
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

Yes, I read it, but I heard the deaf genie-12 inch pianist joke before.

Best twitter posts of the epic match:

@dougrobson - Whoever is supplying Mahut with hair gel needs to ink a sponsorship deal now.

@Wimbledon - FYI, with @Wimbledon live scoring devices, please add 50 to the games in the fifth set of the Isner v Mahut match.

@HolterMedia - Nice to see that a three-day test has come to tennis here @wimbledon.



Andy wearring Crocs, courtesy of Smitty8
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post #12 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 07:09 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

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Originally Posted by Chloe le Bopper
Well, I did read the punchline
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post #13 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 07:13 PM
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

Very good, Adam I look forward to the daily installment

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post #14 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 07:13 PM
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

Adam. As i said to Deb, you are such a dude, girl,

The Tennis Diet:
On the eve of the Roddick/Cilic match, my brother made Seafood Marinara. Can't eat it,
it's not part of the diet; it is enemy food. ie. Marin-ara Cilic.
I also did not eat Curry 'cos it rhymes with Murray.


I fangirl for Roddickulous, Youzhless and the Djoke.
g1MmYM@NnN!!!122!!
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post #15 of 296 (permalink) Old 01-03-2006, 07:14 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Adam's joke-a-day thread (99% guaranteed to make you laugh)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fee
Yes, I read it, but I heard the deaf genie-12 inch pianist joke before.
Fine, I shall tell you another one then..........

A man with no arms and no legs is sunbathing on the beach. He is approached by 3 beautful women who take pity on him. The first woman says to him, "have you ever been hugged?". The man shakes his head sadly, so she leans down and gives him a big hug. The second woman says to him, "have you ever been kissed?". The man shakes his head and she leans down and gives him a big kiss. The third woman asks, "have you ever been fucked?". "No" says the man, his eyes lighting up". "Well, you are now. The tide's coming in" says the woman
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