Originally Posted by @Sweet Cleopatra
to be honest as i m on my bed now i am frightened and exauhsted its hard to accept either 2 options i dont know if this is real or not if its then i am not free if not then i am nuts i feel scared cause as i am on my bed now in my own room i feel there r cameras it makes me sick and tired, they made a test and from scale of 1 to 10 i am 5.5 they told i am not schizophrenic but could be in the next 2 years i dont hear voices or see hallucinations or disorganization and i am clean and also i dont have smug ego, but they say i have paranoid ideas and other traits of schizophrenic personality and my family history that gave me high score
i dont want to go again i dont like them and i wanted to beat them the last time as they kept talking and talking till i got a headache but i also dont want to hear hallucinations next year what shall i do if i become schizophrenic i will kill myself cause also i dont know if they really spy on me and if i kill myself no one will do that to me
Look, killing yourself is not the answer. If I were you I would contact a doctor, they have medicine that is not dangerous but will help calm you down so you will feel better. I have a female friend who is burned out-depressed who really gets help from that, you are not alone in feeling this way.