Dude you are trying a bit too much
Just be yourself, this is just a board. Jokes aside, why do you have to look so childish to win a contest run by a man who has an ass as avatar?
When I was 12, I thought it would be funny to sh!t into a Pringles can...so I did. The log nearly filled the entire can. Then I got the brilliant idea to fill the rest of the can with water and leave it out in my backyard. It was winter at the time so I imagined it would freeze as a cylinder of ice with a log of sh!t in the middle. The next night, my drunk older brother (who was 16) and his buddies came stumbling through the backyard. One of them saw the can and decided to kick it. Instead of freezing, the can had turned into a chilled tube of diarrhea. It sprayed all over the guy who kicked its foot and his buddy's Philly Eagles jacket. I laughed my ass off as they washed my sh!t off their shoes and coat. One of them had a mustache (at 16) so I didn't give a phuck. They knew it was sh!t, but they never knew its origins.