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post #31 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-13-2011, 06:08 PM
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Re: Friend's betrayal

I guess this may be a different case, but I'm of afraid of stabbing one of my friends in the back, a guy who was my college roommate for the last 3 years. He's liked this girl for like over 2 years and she has shown no interest in him and last year I even told him not to invest his time in perusing her. I thought it was good advice because it was going nowhere with him and this girl. He was just obsessing over her for way too long, even though there are plenty of fish in the sea.

This year him and I live in different apartments, but the irony is that I've started to get very close to his former crush. I know she also likes me, but one of the few things that's holding me back from starting a relationship with her is the fear of stabbing him in the back. Furthermore, he may think that I purposely tried to talk him out of perusing this girl and then stole her from him.

...But the point is that I still feel that I gave him good advise and my actions toward this girl are not out of spite towards my friend. Me and her are simply more compatible. So in this situation it may look like I'm stabbing him in the back but I'm genuinely not trying to. I don't know your exact situation but oftentimes these cases of betrayal are just misunderstandings. There may be more to the situation than your are seeing.

If you are for some reason upset about the popularity contest just remember that you are going up against another really good poster. I definitely would have voted for you in other match-ups. And on top of that it is just a contest on an internet forum. It may sound harsh, but worry more about maintaining good relationships in real life and staying popular among those group of friends.

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post #32 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-13-2011, 09:00 PM
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Re: Friend's betrayal

If its really eating you up inside so much, v-money, just talk to your friend about getting with that girl. Don't ask, just announce. "I am with so and so."

And see how he reacts. And then react to his reaction.

In the end, all will work out fine. Most likely, he'll be fine with it. May even help him get over her.

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post #33 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-13-2011, 09:01 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Friend's betrayal

Groove can you copy what v-money wrote ? can't see, he is on ignore list

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post #34 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-13-2011, 09:14 PM
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Re: Friend's betrayal

Come on, mate, remove him from your ignore list. v-money is quality, even if he voted against you.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Novak Djokovic
Obviously, you play a lot of mind games with yourself, but it is important to always believe that you can play your best, perform your best, and in the end, your convictions are stronger than your doubts.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
If I took the time to respond to every criticism that came across my desk, there would be no time for constructive work.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Humphrey Bogart
The only thing you owe the audience is a good performance
Quote:
Originally Posted by Niccolo Machiavelli
There is nothing more difficult to take in hand, more perilous to conduct, or more uncertain in its success, than to take the lead in the introduction of a new order of things.
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post #35 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-13-2011, 09:21 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Friend's betrayal

business first, then joy

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post #36 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-14-2011, 12:46 AM
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Re: Friend's betrayal

v-money, it sounds like the best thing to do is to have an honest conversation with your friend. Talking about things is always the best way to approach a potentially thorny situation. Good luck.

Samanosuke - . Even though you probably won't see this as I'm on your ignore list.

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post #37 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-14-2011, 12:56 AM
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Re: Friend's betrayal

Your first mistake is trusting anyone in the first place - true friends don't exist, only people with similar interests, who sometimes help each other.

Betrayal? Only because you thought of someone as your "friend", does not mean the person harbored similar thoughts, it was a deception all alone for some benefit.
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post #38 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-14-2011, 01:59 AM
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Re: Friend's betrayal

Thanks for the advice folks. I was definitely going to talk to my friend about it but I didn't want to stress him out before his standardized exams.

Betrayal is really an interesting subject because it depends what perspective you view it from. Hopefully samanosuke will realize that us voting against him is not betrayal. I really didn't think that he would be the poster to get dramatic over this contest.

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Keep [t]rolling Bernard, keep [t]rolling.
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Originally Posted by Thanos View Post
tomic just keep on [t]rolling
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post #39 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-15-2011, 08:42 PM
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Re: Friend's betrayal

Quote:
Originally Posted by samanosuke View Post
Have you ever been betrayed from someone who you considered as best buddy ? All the time, he was acting like everything is great but at the same time he was ambushing you behind your back . Have you ever been really disappointed in someone and how did you react on that betrayal ? Did you forgive him/her , if you did, have you ever again had full confidence in him/her like before betrayal ?
Dude, you are getting screwed over all over the place lately. First this, just a few days later that unbelievable popcon series of betrayals, life does suck, eh?
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post #40 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-15-2011, 08:43 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Friend's betrayal

yes, specially if one is connected with the other

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post #41 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-15-2011, 09:15 PM
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Re: Friend's betrayal

Don't worry, sama. You will find a good woman soon and she will repair you.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Novak Djokovic
Obviously, you play a lot of mind games with yourself, but it is important to always believe that you can play your best, perform your best, and in the end, your convictions are stronger than your doubts.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
If I took the time to respond to every criticism that came across my desk, there would be no time for constructive work.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Humphrey Bogart
The only thing you owe the audience is a good performance
Quote:
Originally Posted by Niccolo Machiavelli
There is nothing more difficult to take in hand, more perilous to conduct, or more uncertain in its success, than to take the lead in the introduction of a new order of things.
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post #42 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-15-2011, 09:20 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Friend's betrayal

eh my Johnny, women will always be there, friends won't

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post #43 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-15-2011, 09:28 PM
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Re: Friend's betrayal

Real friends are diamonds, man, I know, believe me.

It ain't easy, the only thing you need is time.

Maybe a time transplant.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Novak Djokovic
Obviously, you play a lot of mind games with yourself, but it is important to always believe that you can play your best, perform your best, and in the end, your convictions are stronger than your doubts.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
If I took the time to respond to every criticism that came across my desk, there would be no time for constructive work.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Humphrey Bogart
The only thing you owe the audience is a good performance
Quote:
Originally Posted by Niccolo Machiavelli
There is nothing more difficult to take in hand, more perilous to conduct, or more uncertain in its success, than to take the lead in the introduction of a new order of things.
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post #44 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-15-2011, 09:28 PM
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Re: Friend's betrayal

Quote:
Originally Posted by samanosuke View Post
eh my Johnny, women will always be there, friends won't
Too right.

Add to the roll-call of shame:

Commander Data,
& Pirata.

Now I know how Julius Caesar felt. Cassius in this case was Jolan Gago, with his false propaganda (out-of-context quotation in his sig), poisoning Brutus/CD's mind.

"There is no such thing as 'the world'." - Enoch Powell.
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post #45 of 54 (permalink) Old 12-15-2011, 09:32 PM
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Re: Friend's betrayal

I think my sig appropriately reflects the context.
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