Attention Seeker Thread. - Apocalypse Now..... Enlightenment Tomorrow. - Page 168 - MensTennisForums.com
 
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post #2506 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 12:13 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

Mmmm...the stripwires express.

RIP Henry Chinaski. A true MTF legend
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post #2507 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 12:21 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

At the moment on the TV there is a doco about the Romanian Gypsies in England begging and involved in other crime.

This was one of the things Prima Donna was always going about in Italy.

On Nadal bumping him on the changeover, Rosol said: "It's ok, he wanted to take my concentration; I knew he would try something".


Wilander on Dimitrov - "He has mind set on imitating Federer and yes it looks good. But he has no idea what to do on the court".

Quote:
Originally Posted by Filo V. View Post
I definitely would have preferred Gaba winning as he needs the points much more, but Jan would have beaten him anyway. I expect Hajek to destroy Machado, like 6-1 6-2.
Machado wins 6-2 6-1
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post #2508 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 03:03 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

That story is terribly embarrassing.

Btw, Thanos you are moving to Brazil next year? I sort of remember you mentioning something like that.

“For life be, after all, only a waitin' for somethin' else than what we're doin'; and death be all that we can rightly depend on.” - Bram Stoker, Dracula
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post #2509 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 04:12 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

Arsen shattered that he missed the comedy fest of Fognini and Young in Vienna.

On Nadal bumping him on the changeover, Rosol said: "It's ok, he wanted to take my concentration; I knew he would try something".


Wilander on Dimitrov - "He has mind set on imitating Federer and yes it looks good. But he has no idea what to do on the court".

Quote:
Originally Posted by Filo V. View Post
I definitely would have preferred Gaba winning as he needs the points much more, but Jan would have beaten him anyway. I expect Hajek to destroy Machado, like 6-1 6-2.
Machado wins 6-2 6-1
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post #2510 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 04:16 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - His name is Gago, JolanGago.

Quote:
Originally Posted by acionescu View Post
Tasty bread to make a ham sandwich
Good ham needs some marinade.

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post #2511 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 04:17 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

Quote:
Originally Posted by tennizen View Post
That story is terribly embarrassing.

Btw, Thanos you are moving to Brazil next year? I sort of remember you mentioning something like that.
Update on the future white supremacist, please.
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post #2512 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 04:21 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

The code for posting pics on MTF should be

[OMG]........[/OMG]

This relates especially to the pics of MTF members thread.
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post #2513 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 04:33 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - Yippie Kay Yay

Quote:
Originally Posted by tennizen View Post
There was some reporting apparently but it's pretty clear scoobs was just looking for some excuse to close it down. Loves his headmaster role too much.
Yes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by tripwires View Post
I have four umbrellas. Bought one recently when I was trapped in Marks & Spencer without an umbrella while it rained pretty heavily outside. What have you been busy doing lately?
Loads of absolutely exciting work.
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post #2514 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 05:01 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - His name is Gago, JolanGago.

Quote:
Originally Posted by gaitare View Post
Good ham needs some marinade.

maybe. But the sliced bread doesnt

L'alma dell'alma mia,
Il cor del mio cor...
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post #2515 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 05:08 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

white bread is just as bad as white power

Nole CYGS 2017
Copy this signature to join the bandwagon before it's too late.
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post #2516 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 07:16 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

maybe. But it is brown bread in this case

L'alma dell'alma mia,
Il cor del mio cor...
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post #2517 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 07:35 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

hema, are you sure you are ready to be a mom?

Quote:
Test 1: Preparation

Women: To prepare for pregnancy

1. Put on a dressing gown and stick a beanbag down the front.

2. Leave it there.

3. After 9 months remove 5% of the beans.

Men: To prepare for children

1. Go to a local chemist, tip the contents of your wallet onto the counter and tell the pharmacist to help himself

2. Go to the supermarket. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.

3. Go home. Pick up the newspaper and read it for the last time.


Test 2: Knowledge

Find a couple who are already parents and berate them about their methods of discipline, lack of patience, appallingly low tolerance levels and how they have allowed their children to run wild.

Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's sleeping habits, toilet training, table manners and overall behaviour.

Enjoy it. It will be the last time in your life that you will have all the answers.


Test 3: Nights

To discover how the nights will feel:

1. Walk around the living room from 5pm to 10pm carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 4 - 6kg, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly.

2. At 10pm, put the bag down, set the alarm for midnight and go to sleep.

3. Get up at 11pm and walk the bag around the living room until 1am.

4. Set the alarm for 3am.

5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2am and make a cup of tea.

6. Go to bed at 2.45am.

7. Get up again at 3am when the alarm goes off.

8. Sing songs in the dark until 4am.

9. Put the alarm on for 5am. Get up when it goes off.

10. Make breakfast.

Keep this up for 5 years. LOOK CHEERFUL.


Test 4: Dressing Small Children

1. Buy a live octopus and a string bag.

2. Attempt to put the octopus into the string bag so that no arms hangout.

Time Allowed: 5 minutes.


Test 5: Cars

1. Forget the BMW. Buy a practical 5-door wagon.

2. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there.

3. Get a coin. Insert it into the CD player.

4. Take a box of chocolate biscuits; mash them into the back seat.

5. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.


Test 6: Going for a walk

a. Wait.

b. Go out the front door.

c. Come back in again.

d. Go out.

e. Come back in again.

f. Go out again.

g. Walk down the front path.

h. Walk back up it.

i. Walk down it again.

j. Walk very slowly down the road for five minutes.

k. Stop, inspect minutely and ask at least 6 questions about every piece of used chewing gum, dirty tissue and dead insect along the way.

l. Retrace your steps.

m. Scream that you have had as much as you can stand until the neighbors come out and stare at you.

n. Give up and go back into the house.

You are now just about ready to try taking a small child for a walk.


Test 7: Conversations with children

Repeat everything you say at least 5 times.


Test 8: Grocery Shopping

1. Go to the local supermarket. Take with you the nearest thing you can find to a pre-school child - a fully grown goat is excellent. If you intend to have more than one child, take more than one goat.

2. Buy your weekly groceries without letting the goat(s) out of your sight.

3. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys.



Test 9: Feeding a 1 year-old

1. Hollow out a melon

2. Make a small hole in the side

3. Suspend the melon from the ceiling and swing it side to side

4. Now get a bowl of soggy cornflakes and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon while pretending to be an aeroplane.

5. Continue until half the cornflakes are gone.

6. Tip the rest into your lap, making sure that a lot of it falls on the floor.


Test 10:TV

1. Learn the names of every character from the Wiggles, Barney, Teletubbies and Disney.

2. Watch nothing else on television for at least 5 years.


Test 11: Mess

1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains

2. Hide a fish behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.

3. Stick your fingers in the flowerbeds and then rub them on clean walls. Cover the stains with crayon. How does that look?

4. Empty every drawer/cupboard/storage box in your house onto the floor and proceed with step 5.

5. Drag randomly items from one room to another room and leave them there.


Test 12: Long Trips with Toddlers

1. Make a recording of someone shouting 'Mummy' repeatedly. Important Notes: No more than a 4 second delay between each Mummy. Include occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet.

2. Play this tape in your car, everywhere you go for the next 4 years.

You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.


Test 13:Conversations

1. Start talking to an adult of your choice.

2. Have someone else continually tug on your shirt hem or shirt sleeve while playing the Mummy tape listed above.

You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.


Test 14: Getting ready for work

1. Pick a day on which you have an important meeting.

2. Put on your finest work attire.

3. Take a cup of cream and put 1 cup of lemon juice in it

4. Stir

5. Dump half of it on your nice silk shirt

6. Saturate a towel with the other half of the mixture

7. Attempt to clean your shirt with the same saturated towel

8. Do not change (you have no time).

9. Go directly to work

You are now ready to have children. ENJOY!!
test 2, 12 and 13 are so true

L'alma dell'alma mia,
Il cor del mio cor...

Last edited by acionescu; 10-17-2012 at 08:05 PM.
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post #2518 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 09:14 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

I love the new thread title.

Roger Federer

Quote:
Originally Posted by Matt01 View Post
Fed's groundstrokes never were that good to begin with.
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post #2519 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-17-2012, 10:44 PM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

you would......
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post #2520 of 5005 (permalink) Old 10-18-2012, 01:23 AM
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Re: Attention Seekers Vol. 2012 - All Aboard the Tripwires Express.

Even more so because of the slight Federer reference. Thanos.

Roger Federer

Quote:
Originally Posted by Matt01 View Post
Fed's groundstrokes never were that good to begin with.
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