Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo... - MensTennisForums.com

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post #1 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 12:06 PM Thread Starter
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Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

If Federer manages to ever read this thread and remembers to eat a bagel before the tournament begins, he will definitely be the winner of TMS event in Monte Carlo and the irrefutable champion of the galaxy.

Listen... Bagels are very important.

No smamming or dissing please.

Thank You!
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post #2 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 12:08 PM
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

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Originally Posted by Oxygene7 View Post
If Federer manages to ever read this thread and remembers to eat a bagel before the tournament begins, he will definitely be the winner of Monte Carlo and the irrefutable champion of the galaxy.

Listen... Bagels are very important.

No smamming or dissing please.

Thank You!
You are being metaphorical rite?
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post #3 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 12:11 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

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Originally Posted by JamesObv. View Post
You are being metaphorical rite?
No James, just wise. I am a leading figure in the study of the effects that bagels have on sports stars. The results? Eat a bagel and the world is your oyster. How can the world be everyones oyster? Well.. that is the beauty of it.
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post #4 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 12:43 PM
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

ummm..ok??

I cannot stand Djokovic
NEW YORK METS

I'm an American who loves clay tennis and the clay season...what is wrong with that picture?
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post #5 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 12:49 PM
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

Wow what a great thread with no point.

Mats Wilander!!!

Robin Bo Carl Söderling
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post #6 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 12:49 PM
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

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Originally Posted by Oxygene7 View Post
No James, just wise. I am a leading figure in the study of the effects that bagels have on sports stars. The results? Eat a bagel and the world is your oyster. How can the world be everyones oyster? Well.. that is the beauty of it.


Ok you're joking....

But still... Maybe you need to explain yourself a little better. So..Bagels help pro players play better. Why? (Looking forward to this answer )
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post #7 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 12:55 PM
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

No spamming or dissing, dude your a 'tard mate, what a thread, shame it came after the Arse clown TMS you would of been up there challenging.

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Originally Posted by Ichiban1920 View Post
It's my job to put these pathetic Nadull-fanboys in their place. They're the scourge and bane of the tennis world.
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Originally Posted by Arhaych View Post
Nadal is more conservative than Margaret Thatcher.
^^QFT

"I asked a bloke in the front row if he liked the serve-and-volley stuff," said Rafter. "He said he did but asked if he was going to get to see any rallies. 'Not today, mate,' I told him."-Pat Rafter silencing the Nadull fanboys
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post #8 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 12:58 PM
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

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Originally Posted by Oxygene7 View Post
No James, just wise. I am a leading figure in the study of the effects that bagels have on sports stars. The results? Eat a bagel and the world is your oyster. How can the world be everyones oyster? Well.. that is the beauty of it.
Very philosophical

novakdjokovic marioancic andymurray ernestsgulbis richardgasquet stanislaswawrinka


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Ernests Gulbis on seeing HEAD racquets being made by hand:
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post #9 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 01:08 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

Quote:
Originally Posted by JamesObv. View Post


Ok you're joking....

But still... Maybe you need to explain yourself a little better. So..Bagels help pro players play better. Why? (Looking forward to this answer )
I could give you some BS long winded answer... like how the word bagels and tennis share a striking parallel! (2 vowels and 4 consonants - WoW!) Or like how bagels strangely resemble the shapes of some galaxies... and thus inherently gives the eater the wisdom and courage of the stars. Instead though I will only tell you the boring and honest truth.

For a tennis player the simple answer is this:

If a tennis player eats a bagel within a couple of days before playing in a tournament, while on the tennis court they will subliminally be thinking of bagels and how DELICIOUS they are. This in turn puts their mind off the match, but they don't realize it. Before said player knows it, they have lost the first set. The magic kicks in when the player on the other side of the net subliminally believes that the set was given to him - that the bagel eating player was not giving it 100%. This is where the magic of eating the bagel kicks in. The opponent of the bagel muncher, due to his subliminal belief, cannot sustain the same level of intensity or consistency. This coincides with the fact that after a set of tennis the bagels effects wear off (This can sometimes take slightly longer or shorter than one set mind). The interesting thing is where the transference of the bagels power has suddenly dissipated to... the answer? The racquet. All of a sudden the 2 days previous bagel devourer can hit the ball 20 percent harder, with 20 percent more angles.. has 20 percent more touch etc.


This is why James, eating a bagel almost guarantees victory, and in the case of Roger Federer, a 100 percent assured victory.
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post #10 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 01:09 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

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Originally Posted by Byrd View Post
No spamming or dissing, dude your a 'tard mate, what a thread, shame it came after the Arse clown TMS you would of been up there challenging.
Oh man, I am just being ironic .. The Federer needs a miracle to win Monte Carlo thread inspired me.
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post #11 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 01:12 PM
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

mmmm.... bagels.

Do you think if Iate a bagel, I could win Monte Carlo? Or does this trick only work for Roger....
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post #12 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 01:12 PM
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

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Originally Posted by Oxygene7 View Post
Oh man, I am just being ironic .. The Federer needs a miracle to win Monte Carlo thread inspired me.
If you say so, but the amount of 'tards on the board make it hard to distinguish between a joke post or an actual thread

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Originally Posted by Ichiban1920 View Post
It's my job to put these pathetic Nadull-fanboys in their place. They're the scourge and bane of the tennis world.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Arhaych View Post
Nadal is more conservative than Margaret Thatcher.
^^QFT

"I asked a bloke in the front row if he liked the serve-and-volley stuff," said Rafter. "He said he did but asked if he was going to get to see any rallies. 'Not today, mate,' I told him."-Pat Rafter silencing the Nadull fanboys
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post #13 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 01:16 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

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Originally Posted by Byrd View Post
If you say so, but the amount of 'tards on the board make it hard to distinguish between a joke post or an actual thread
I'll be the first to admit that this IS a very lame thread.
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post #14 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 01:18 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

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Originally Posted by cmurray View Post
mmmm.... bagels.

Do you think if Iate a bagel, I could win Monte Carlo? Or does this trick only work for Roger....
Well you couldn't just eat one and then beat him if you have never played tennis. If you play to a reasonable standard though, I would say you have a 30 percent chance.. not bad huh? I know, I know, I forgot to mention that victory is not assured unless you have some experience in the sport itself, that was an oversight. The rest of the world though will catch up to the bagel eaters though so expect some strange and rapid fluctuations in the top 10 this year.
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post #15 of 17 (permalink) Old 04-11-2007, 01:29 PM
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Re: Federer needs a bagel to win Monte Carlo...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Oxygene7 View Post
No James, just wise. I am a leading figure in the study of the effects that bagels have on sports stars. The results? Eat a bagel and the world is your oyster. How can the world be everyones oyster? Well.. that is the beauty of it.
another contender for the ACC 2007???

A post that deserves to be on MTF Hall of Fame soon:

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Take that you bitch. In your face. And to top it off her son, Novak went out in the 3rd round, has been leapfrogged by Murray in the rankings and is only a little bit ahead off Juan Martin In yo face, biatch.
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