Laws of MTF - Page 9 - MensTennisForums.com

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post #121 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 05:36 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blaze-2004
You know thats law 10, right?

"Tennis coverage in the USA is a joke and the commentators are all tools"
Aw fuck.
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post #122 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 05:41 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

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Originally Posted by AgassiDomination
Aw fuck.
Maybe yours could be an addendum. I mean, USA is not equivalent to 'the world'. So maybe 10.1 could be AD's law?
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post #123 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 05:42 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blaze-2004
10. Tennis coverage in the USA is a joke, and the commentators are all tools.
Brilliant post.

This one is my favourite, hear it so often.
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post #124 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 05:44 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

How about, "Being a regular poster in NT means you know nothing absolutely nothing about tennis." Natas' law?
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post #125 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 05:46 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

you missed Everyone on MTF is a 5.0+ player
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post #126 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 06:01 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blaze-2004
After looking through MTF since the beginning of the year, i've noticed some trends. Feel free to criticize, flame, and degrade the theories

1. Making sense is optional

2. The probably of a thread on MTF becoming about Roger Federer or Rafael Nadal or both approaches 1 with respect to time (Mandoura’s Law)

3. Speculation can be treated as fact, as can fact be considered speculation

4. Injuries are always faked, especially if the sufferer is Roddick or Hewitt (Deb's Law)

5. Supporting PHM can cause serious damages to your health (Julie's Law)

6. Everyone loves Safin. There are 2 groups of people, Rafa fans and Fed fans, and they don’t like each other too much. And everyone hates (or, at least dislikes) Roddick (Jenanun's Law)

7. (Insert noun here) is on the juice

8. Choke=Lose

9. Everyone loves BYE

10. Tennis coverage in the USA is a joke, and the commentators are all tools.

11. You do not talk about the WTA in a positive light

12. Just because a thread begins as “A” topic, doesn’t mean it cant translate to “B”, “C”, and “D” topic

13. Safin= Top 10 killa, Whole ATP Tour= Donald Young Killa, Fed= Whole ATP killa, Rafa= Fedkilla, = Rafa killa

14. If you make a post, expect to be criticized, flamed, and degraded by someone else by use of personal insults. Also, threads based on a quote from an idiot tennis figure head MUST be flamed to no end.

15. EVERYTHING gets blown out of proportion

16. Jerry Seinfeld and Chloe never lose an argument (Jerry's Law)

17. Horrible spelling, grammar misuse, and other butcherings of the English language are mandatory

18. Double standards, stereotypes, and generalizations are a must.

19. Signatures must contain either a quirky tid bit of wisdom or a laundry list of the players you support. Quotes from random movies, TV shows, or other posters are a plus. Of course 10,000 smilies are firmly required, as is a cheap shot to one or more posters.

20. MTF is a perpetual cyclone of the exact same ideas and thoughts and can be discussed ad nauseum and yet no one gets bored or leaves

21. Infamous posters change their usernames as often Puff Daddy does his, if not more so

22. Tennis is rigged. It's even more fake than professional wrestling.(GeorgeWHitler's law).

23. Useless threads, random stupdity, and smily overuse is mandatory

24. Good ways to earn vcash are creating threads that are either a quote from a person calling someone else out, a thread meant for bashing someone, threads proclaiming yourself to be the next federer when in fact, you eat bagels all day, or, more specifically, a thread that calls out Federer's dominance; each of these will elicit tons of posters from both sides of the issue, with flamewars, namecalling, and hilarity to ensue, while the thread creator swims in vriches

25. Anyone supporting a tennis player should be assumed to have some kind of sexual infatuation with said player, even if they don't recognize it themselves. (Joe's Law)

26. All player's fans are called -tards. Fedtards, Rafatards, Safintards, Djokotards, etc. These radical groups of people always believe their player to be superior and any player that beat him is a joke, on the juice, cheating, ugly, fat, a fluke, and will never beat him again. Also, stupidity and bias are prevelent in their posts and signatures.

27. The number of supporters of a given player increases proportionally with the players' rate of success but the number of haters increases exponentially with the player's rate of success. Also, if a relatively low-ranked and little known player upsets [insert top-ranked player here], that player's bandwagon fills with haters of [insert top-ranked player here]

28. The bigger the 'i'm leaving' announcement is, the less likely that a user will actually leave MTF. People who do leave here never give notice, they just disappear. (Tall One's Law)


Did I miss any?


you could condense it into a single law: MTF is a cesspool of stupidity filled with people of average and below-average intelligence.
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post #127 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 06:05 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

If someone disagrees with you and you don't have a smart repartee, then add the emoticon :retard: or something similar; it is supposed to help you feel smarter momentarily and supposed to inflict terrible feelings of shame on the original poster. As an added bonus, it will distract from the previous poster's comment and you will feel victorious!
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post #128 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 06:12 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by R.Federer
If someone disagrees with you and you don't have a smart repartee, then add the emoticon :retard: or something similar; it is supposed to help you feel smarter momentarily and supposed to inflict terrible feelings of shame on the original poster. As an added bonus, it will distract from the previous poster's comment and you will feel victorious!
:retard:
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post #129 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 06:14 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by Langers
:retard:
:hiding face in shame:
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post #130 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 06:16 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by R.Federer
:hiding face in shame:
Victory is mine.
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post #131 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 07:00 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by Langers
Victory is mine.
That must mean you didn't have a smart repartee to begin with

Hey- why isn't this being added on as a law? Maybe I'll start another set of laws
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post #132 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 07:03 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by R.Federer
That must mean you didn't have a smart repartee to begin with

Hey- why isn't this being added on as a law? Maybe I'll start another set of laws

Law 29: Plagiarise another person's thread as a joke/to prove a point and have multiple threads on the same topic. (Remember the plethora of 'juice' threads?)

Emotions of a Safin fan


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post #133 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 07:03 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Laws of MTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by R.Federer
That must mean you didn't have a smart repartee to begin with

Hey- why isn't this being added on as a law? Maybe I'll start another set of laws
Law 14 edited: "If you make a post, expect to be criticized, flamed, and degraded by someone else by use of personal insults. Also, threads based on a quote from an idiot tennis figure head MUST be flamed to no end. Also, going off on off-topic tangents, namecalling, and use of the :retard: smily are good ways of winning arguments."

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Novak Djokovic
Obviously, you play a lot of mind games with yourself, but it is important to always believe that you can play your best, perform your best, and in the end, your convictions are stronger than your doubts.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
If I took the time to respond to every criticism that came across my desk, there would be no time for constructive work.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Humphrey Bogart
The only thing you owe the audience is a good performance
Quote:
Originally Posted by Niccolo Machiavelli
There is nothing more difficult to take in hand, more perilous to conduct, or more uncertain in its success, than to take the lead in the introduction of a new order of things.
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post #134 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 07:05 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Laws of MTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by kajonie
Law 29: Plagiarise another person's thread as a joke/to prove a point and have multiple threads on the same topic. (Remember the plethora of 'juice' threads?)
Law 20, the cyclone of the same thoughts and ideas law. or is it 21?

Also, I kept these laws vague and generalized so I didnt have to edit them everytime something new happened

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Novak Djokovic
Obviously, you play a lot of mind games with yourself, but it is important to always believe that you can play your best, perform your best, and in the end, your convictions are stronger than your doubts.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
If I took the time to respond to every criticism that came across my desk, there would be no time for constructive work.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Humphrey Bogart
The only thing you owe the audience is a good performance
Quote:
Originally Posted by Niccolo Machiavelli
There is nothing more difficult to take in hand, more perilous to conduct, or more uncertain in its success, than to take the lead in the introduction of a new order of things.
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post #135 of 529 (permalink) Old 07-05-2006, 07:21 PM
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Re: Laws of MTF

Quote:
Originally Posted by kajonie
Law 29: Plagiarise another person's thread as a joke/to prove a point and have multiple threads on the same topic. (Remember the plethora of 'juice' threads?)
Yeah.... or hijack it by introducing a passing thought on an entirely unrelated matter.
Hey, do you remember when Andre lost to rafter in the sf of Wimbledon and dissed the lineswoman in the post match interview? Any thoughts on that?
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