ARTICLE/PHOTO: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton - MensTennisForums.com
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post #1 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 04:01 AM Thread Starter
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ARTICLE/PHOTO: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

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Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton
http://www.chaser.com.au/show_story....44&ED=90&CAT=1


The scan that proved Hewitt was the father

Fourteen weeks after its conception, Lleyton Hewitt and Bec Cartwright’s embryo is already more mature than its father. The gelatinous cluster of cells proved its superior temperament during an ultrasound examination yesterday in which it went over thirty minutes without yelling the phrase “Come Onnnnn!”

The embryo was also found to respect the umpire’s rulings, be capable of losing gracefully and to not understand what’s so special about Rocky.

“He’s a little ripper,” said an emotional Hewitt. “What an Aussie legend. Arrrgggghhh”. The tennis champ completed his thought via a series of chest thumps, emotional winces, fist pumps and grunts.

Doctors did however express fears that the foetus may have inherited its father’s sense of fashion after the ultrasound discovered its umbilical chord coming out of its back.

The baby is due to be born in October, although Hewitt and Cartwright are understood to be entertaining a request from Channel Seven to delay the birth until February to coincide with the new ratings period.

Cartwright has found the pregnancy “quite easy” to date. “It’s certainly been easier than the conception was, with the Fanatics bedside cheering Lleyton on,” she said.

“We just can’t wait for the baby to be born,” she said. “I know Lleyton’s dying to teach it how to scream.”

With less than five months until birth, the baby appears happy and contented which, given its parentage, demonstrates that it is also already a better actor than its mother.


Last edited by sprinterluck; 08-17-2005 at 06:12 AM.
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post #2 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 04:10 AM
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Re: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

Too freaking hilarious

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post #3 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 04:27 AM
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Re: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

Mean but really funny
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post #4 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 04:31 AM
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Re: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

Watch out, little baby. Dad is veeery big and if he's still fucking mom, he could reach u too

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post #5 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 04:47 AM
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Re: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

as soon as that fetus realizes that his umbilical cord is not actually a penis like lleytons, he'll melt down, and end up just just like dad...........
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post #6 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 04:49 AM
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Re: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

Quote:
Originally Posted by alfonsojose
Watch out, little baby. Dad is veeery big and if he's still fucking mom, he could reach u too
I dont see how that is possible since the newlyweds are followed everywhere by the inlaws

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post #7 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 05:03 AM
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Re: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

Those chaser guys have "teenage humour brought to you by guys in their 30s" down pat.

They are funny though Their election commentary series were brilliant.
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post #8 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 05:05 AM
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Re: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

I'd be more worried about the kid inheriting Bec's fashion sense

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post #9 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 05:20 AM
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Re: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

When I first saw the ultrasound pic, I thought oh yes, he's inheirited his dad's long schlong, then I realised it was the umbilical cord
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post #10 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 05:44 AM
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Re: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

Funniest thing I've read in a while
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post #11 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 05:47 AM
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Re: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

this is bladder-worthy. sick but funny

Q. When you've played as few matches as you have over the last two, three months, did you ever lack motivation to go out and practice?

ANDY RODDICK: Motivation? No. I enjoy what I do. I enjoy what I do. You know, I've never been one to, you know, blow off practice or, you know, do anything like that.

You know, I'd be lying if I said I'm looking forward to practicing the next two days as opposed to playing here. That part is gonna suck...(2010 Aegon Championships)
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post #12 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 08:46 AM
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Re: ARTICLE/PHOTO: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

Lmao I love Lleyton, but to the writer(s):

"Cartwright has found the pregnancy “quite easy” to date. “It’s certainly been easier than the conception was, with the Fanatics bedside cheering Lleyton on,” she said."

Too good... This is the same relationship that the British media has with the Beckhams

Jim Thomas - Max Mirnyi - Jordan Kerr - Rohan Bopanna - Andy Roddick - Aisam-Ul-Haq Qureshi - Ilia Bozoljac - Chris Haggard - Jan-Michael Gambill - Donald Young - Nathan Healey - Lleyton Hewitt - Jamie Murray - Olivier Rochus - James Blake - Vince Spadea - Tim Henman - John Isner - Travis Parrott - Paul Goldstein - Tim Henman - Wes Moodie - Arnaud Clement - Michael Russell - Jeff Coetzee

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post #13 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 09:01 AM
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Re: ARTICLE/PHOTO: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

hahahahaa funny
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post #14 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 09:24 AM
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Re: ARTICLE/PHOTO: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

too funny, that was great!!!

JUAN CARLOS FERRERO


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post #15 of 26 (permalink) Old 08-17-2005, 09:54 AM
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Re: ARTICLE/PHOTO: Bec Cartwright’s foetus already more mature than Lleyton

Brilliant!!!
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