MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown - MensTennisForums.com
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
post #1 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 06:47 AM Thread Starter
Registered User
 
viruzzz's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Buenos Aires, Argentina
Posts: 5,429
                     
MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

IMPORTANT NEWS

Mr Dustin Brown, the legend himself, read the MTFBio and announced it into his twitter, give it a look:


Thank you so much, Dustin, i'm glad you enjoyed it, you're a legend of the game and your Bio was a big pleasure to make.

Also thank you Scoobs for posting it here

Okay, here's the bio:

Hello, my beautiful bacon-flavored gummy bears. It's Professor Johnny Viruz and this is:



Today:
Dustin Brown



Oops! Sorry!





This is MTF Bios and not that fake biography you can read on the Internet. So, here we're gonna tell you the REAL story about Dustin Brown.

Dustin Brown was born in mid 1984 in Trenchtown, Kingston, Jamaica. He's the son of legendary reggae singer Bob Marley.

- Sorry to interrupt you, but he was born in Germ...
- SHUT UP!!!! This is the REAL story, i'm working, dude, let me do it without your bitching
- But... You're wrong! He's a germ...
- YOU-BETTER-SHUT-YOUR-ASS-UP


As I was saying...
We all know Bob Marley had a loooot of kids, most of them reggae singers.


You're probably asking: "WEITAMINET you motherfuckin faker, if he's Marley's son why is his surname Brown?"

- Yeah... That's exactly what i'm asking... I also don't know how he could be a son of Bob Marley because he was dead in 1984.
- OKAY, PIECE O' SHIT... I'm so fuckin tired of you. NO! Bob M wasn't dead, that was a fake rumour, the boss is still alive. And YES! his surname is brown because his step dad was James Brown, now please... SHUT UP!!!!


When he was 10 years old, Mini-Dustin started to love tennis, but James Brown wanted him to be a soul-vocalist... Dustin prefered to be a guy like Sampras over a guy like his dad.
So, because of that, he was sent to live in Jamaica again, this time, by himself.

He learned Rastafarian culture, how to make a joint, how to love reggae music and specially, how to play tennis.



Before Dustin, tennis in Jamaica was somthing like this:




And now, it's something like this:



(see? Now there's no hat!)



STYLE OF PLAY

Dustin has a Ph. D from the Monfils university, that means, the guy can play really beautiful points, dominate his rival beeing 6-0 5-0, and then blew so many chances you would need the entire population of Jamaica to count them.
Eventually losing the match 6-0 6-7 6-7.

Or, he can reach his super-dreddy form and win over Fedalovic-fusion-into-one-player and win 6-0 6-2 6-0 6-4 (best of 7)

But we're so good guys, let's look at his tennis weapons in YouTube:

[youtube]1EJaFYbKcvQ[/youtube]

As you can see: The guy can hit the ball with a powerful two handed backhand and a beautiful one-hander it's like Nalbandian having intense brutal sex with Gasquet and having a black rastafarian child. (Oh Richard, how could you? )


One of his signatures shots is the "Weird-return of serve", with that weapon he can hurt even the most talented playrs like Baghdatis or Berlocq:

[youtube]aU_Xq56VQJY[/youtube]

(Skip to minute 6:20)




But his most lethal weapon is the DEADLY FOREHAND:

[youtube]EoFqk4xPBao[/youtube]



In 2010, Dustin Brown decided to play under the german flag.

- ...Okay ...Why?
ARE YOU REALLY ASKING?!?!!


Because this:




And this:




And of course, the final reason, to live everybody's dream.
Becoming this guy:




(Oh come on, German people, don't get mad. You know we all want to become that guy once in our lives)

I actually think Bernard Tomic will easily win career-year mixed doubles slam in 2020.

Jealous? Yeah, you are, you dirty hater.

Last edited by viruzzz; 01-21-2013 at 07:30 PM.
viruzzz is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 06:52 AM
Registered User
 
Roger the Dodger's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Between Roger's ears...
Posts: 8,919
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Dustbin Brown!

"The Fates lead those who Will, those who won't they drag."

― Seneca
Roger the Dodger is offline  
post #3 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 07:39 AM
Registered User
 
TigerTim's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: London (sadly)
Posts: 15,457
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown


Welcome to MTF...
Quote:
Originally Posted by alfonsojose View Post
I'm gonna be checked again. Guess where i am going ?
The guy started massaging my balls harder and faster. I was so relaxed and disconnected i didn't notice, but my body did i had a massive boner and apologized, then he told me "are u excited, uh?" and it was obvious where he wanted to go .. inside my a**
TigerTim is offline  
 
post #4 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 07:43 AM
Registered User
 
Johnbert's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 5,809
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

epic thread

edit: lol
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to viruzzz again.
Johnbert is offline  
post #5 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 01:24 PM
Registered User
 
StevoTG's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 2,426
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnbert View Post
edit: lol
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to viruzzz again.
Same here
StevoTG is offline  
post #6 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 01:37 PM
♤23♤
 
Deathless Mortal's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 32,984
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown



"a kad me opet gore vrati zahvalit' ću Mu prvo
što nam je dao komad zemlje što je za sebe sačuv'o"
Deathless Mortal is offline  
post #7 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 01:40 PM
Registered User
 
leng jai's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Oxford (at heart)
Age: 30
Posts: 25,498
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Bored viruzz is an asset to MTF

WARNING: This signature may contain extreme traces of bullying and glory hunting
TOMMY HASS
0 slams () and 0 finals
0 consecutive weeks at world no. 1
0 consecutive Laureus World Sports Awards
0 times qualified for YEC
2-13 H2H against motivated Federer
0-5 H2H against RAFA
Career low ranking: 1,241 (26.06.1995)
0 fake mullets flaunted in Roland Garros finals.
0 double bagels consumed against Raonic on grass
1 first name in common with Tommy Robredo
leng jai is offline  
post #8 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 01:42 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 4,773
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Yes thats Dustin
STUHL is offline  
post #9 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 01:43 PM
He Will Return
 
Slade's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Sun Ruler Plateau
Age: 26
Posts: 22,162
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Good shit.

Slade is offline  
post #10 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 02:19 PM
Registered User
 
RonaldGomez's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 1,559
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Hehe, good stuff.

Paire - Flo Mayer - the Dog
My blog (in french) : www.doublefaute.fr | https://twitter.com/#!/Double_Faute
RonaldGomez is offline  
post #11 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 02:23 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 20,146
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Haha, that forehand vid is class.
philosophicalarf is offline  
post #12 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 02:25 PM
Federer fan forever
 
Chirag's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 12,903
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

You are too good

Quote:
Originally Posted by nick the greek View Post
Me and Fed, so special. I want him to stick around as long as possible.
Chirag is offline  
post #13 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 06:19 PM Thread Starter
Registered User
 
viruzzz's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Buenos Aires, Argentina
Posts: 5,429
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Thank you all, keep tuned, MTF Bios isn't going anywhere.
We just need a really boring time.


Quote:
Originally Posted by philosophicalarf View Post
Haha, that forehand vid is class.
Yup. Probably the best video in all youtube.
That's the most powerful weapon in tennis.

I actually think Bernard Tomic will easily win career-year mixed doubles slam in 2020.

Jealous? Yeah, you are, you dirty hater.
viruzzz is offline  
post #14 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 07:00 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 8,966
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Mr. viruzzz, master of satire

Respectfully,
masterclass

Respectful Fan of Great Tennis.
"I embody tennis" - Roger Federer
"Roger and I haven't forgotten how to play tennis" - Rafael Nadal

masterclass is offline  
post #15 of 60 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 07:02 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Posts: 4,660
                     
Re: MTF Bios - When you're bored as fuck waiting for Olympics. Today: Dustin Brown

Germany > Jamaica
martinatreue is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the MensTennisForums.com forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome