Cincy QF - Defeated Nicolas Lapentti 7-6 6-1
1) Spanish mafia running the ATP, why does Nadal keep getting night matches and avoiding the Cincy heat?
2) Lapentti choked away every single break point opportunity.
3) Tennis is dead.
Cincy R3 - Defeated Tommy Haas 6-4 7-6
1) Haas fell apart like a helpless poodle fighting a lion in the tie break (and choked).
2) FakerNadal pulled another win with cheeeating. Was taking waaay too much time before 1st serve, before 1st and 2nd .. Haas just got sick of it at the end.
3) Everyone on tour is just scared of Rafa.
4) Old and feeble Haas is coming off a poor injury filled year.
Cincy R2 - Defeated Florent Serra 6-0 6-1
1) Serra is a very easy match-up for Nadal.
2) Serra is one of the tour's ultra-mugs.
3) They should fine Serra for a lack of effort.
4) Never seen anyone play as horrible as Serra did today.
5) Almagro gave Serra tips on how to bend over for Nadal.
Toronto F - Defeated Nicolas Kiefer 6-3 6-2
1) Cakewalk draw.
2) Mug era.
3) Kiefer only turned up for 1 game.
4) Nadal got lucky that Kiefer can't perform in finals.
Toronto SF - Defeated Andy Murray 7-6 6-3
1) Murray is a pansy.
2) Murray isn't used to playing aggressive tennis, so he wasn't able to keep up a high level throughout.
3) Umpire screwed Murray by not letting him have an injury timeout when he wanted one.
4) Toronto is on blue clay.
5) Ridiculous match, Nadull hit 9 or maybe 10 (if we're being generous) winners.
Toronto QF - Defeated Richard Gasquet 6-7 6-2 6-1
1) Pathetic from Gasquet in the last 2 sets, he bent over for Nadal after winning the first.
2) Gasquet was exhausted after the epic first set, he should have won.
3) Match was on Richie's racquet, couldn't quite pull it off in the end. If he was playing at his peak level he'd have destroyed Nadal.
4) Nadal was just lucky Gasquet's game and fitness are still developing.
Toronto R3 - Defeated Igor Andreev 6-2 7-6
1) Bad from Andreev.
2) Igor got injured early on.
3) Andreev was too tired after reaching 2 finals in the last 2 weeks.
Toronto R2 - Defeated Jesse Levine 6-4 6-2
1) Levine is a mental midget.
2) Too many errors at crucial times from Levine, he controlled the match though.
3) Undeserved win, Levine hit many more winners.
Despite being a clown on the surface, the little piggy has fluked his way to too many wins on the surface for me to go back through every thread. So we shall start from Toronto
Props to Pfloyd for the idea