You should make an amazing comeback with a pretty cool mexican sombrero.
You'd be playing and your rival would make a lot of unforced errors and then he'd be so pissed off he'd make a big shank and yell "Okay mate, WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH THAT HAT?!?!?!"
And then you win it by the mental side, not risking your body at all.
If anyone ask, tell them Tio Viruz helped you.
Believe it or not, I have done that, or at least the hat part...
All last season my doubles partner and I would wear matching pastel Scooby Doo bandanas. Sure every team we played thought we were really immature gay lovers